What Your Breastfeeding Position Says About You How do YOU nurse?

By Babe | Illustration by Ana Hard

There are many different ways to breastfeed. Depending on where you are and what you’re doing, as well as your personality and overall parenting vibe, you might opt for a low-key nap style in bed or an on-the-go upright feed with them all crouched into their carrier. Here’s what your nursing style says about you:

Side-lying: You’re a postpartum goddess who recognizes that life’s about mindful pleasure. Whether you’re tuning into your Headspace app or your energy healer’s Instagram Lives, you’re staying super centered and trying to enjoy your 4th trimester as much as possible. As a Pisces rising, you’ve especially earned it. You’ve also read, like, three chapters of the First 40 Days so you’re here for ALL the rest. Also, you’re tired AF.

Laid-Back: You’re a stress-less kind of gal who’s got this whole postpartum thing in the bag. Why focus on all the little worries when you’re streaming Netflix and you’ve got one hand on the remote and the other on the chip bowl? Your babe will find that nipple eventually. All you have to do is get ‘em in the general direction and they’ll figure the rest out. Also, you’re tired AF.

Cross-cradle hold: Is breastfeeding exactly how you pictured it when you were young and daydreaming about the moment you’d be called mom? Yes, this timeless, classic, iconic nursing position allows you to totally dote on your every little detail of your babe (Those lashes! Those toes! Swoon!) while also relishing in the totally romantic vision of life as a 24/7 lactating machine. It’s actually super important work. Like, in case you didn’t notice, I’m BREASTFEEDING right now. Also, you’re tired AF.

Football hold: The one thing you can’t pawn off onto your postpartum doula or babynurse, so might as well make it less about the baby and more about ALL the free space you have in front of you! Well done. Football is the perfect position when you claim to be on maternity leave, but in actuality you’re nursing AND checking email at the same time. Plus, what’s a little football hold when you’ve got investors to please? Also, you’re tired AF.

Football hold for twins: The fact that you’re even breastfeeding twins basically means you’re a hero however the hell you’re doing it, so congrats on winning at life. BTW you’re tired AF.

Upright in a carrier: You’re a busy bee who’s clearly running the show and you have no problem multi-tasking your day away. You’ve got mouths to feed, literally, so why should breastfeeding stop you from checking off all the boxes of your day? Trip to the post office, check. Making the rounds at the food coop? Check check. Your baby’s just fine in that carrier, a mere suckling nipple away from nutrition. Hell, you might even nurse til they’re in elementary school. Also, you’re tired AF.