Brandi Sellerz on Navigating the First 40 Days. Ask for help.
By Brandi Sellerz | Photos courtesy of Brandi Sellerz
Brandi Sellerz had a life-changing epiphany after reading The First 40 Days, the essential guidebook on how to navigate those magical, insanely crazy days following birth. “It was one of those things where I read the book, and suddenly I had a glimpse into the next 40 years of my life and I pictured my mother, grandmother and all the women in my family,” says Brandi, a doula and founder of Not So Private Parts, a lifestyle platform dedicated to removing stigma associated with women’s health. “I didn’t know how their postpartum period went and I wanted to shift the paradigm and start the conversation, and started with me. It’s a sacred time, to take care of yourself after having a baby.”
Brandi works with women all over the world in helping support their pregnancy journey, but her heart lies with the postpartum experience and how it impacts not just a mother’s physical health but her emotional health, too. As part of our ongoing series, From The Desk of a Doula, we reached out to Brandi to find out what moms can do during the first 40 days to help rest, restore and take a moment to pause with the help of those they love most.
Here Are Brandi's Tips, Below:
"Drink all the water, obviously."
"Allow people to help you and support you. If you can’t afford postpartum support or care, then lean on those friends who say, 'Hey! If you need anything….' Those are the people you respond with, 'Yes, I do.' Even if you don't, just have them come over and I can guarantee you they'll find something to do, even if it's holding the baby while you take a shower."
"This isn't a time to be by yourself in isolation. That’s what breaks my heart that during COVID-19, mamas don't have support right now. No one is coming over. Allow people to support you and love on you anyway they can. Allow people to check in on you. Even during this outbreak, allow people to FaceTime you and put their eyes on you. You'll feel so much better."
"Ask your friends and family to start a Meal Train, which organizes meal giving to those who need a little extra support. During the Coronavirus, they may not be able to bring you meals, but they could drop it at door. Also ask for weekly check-ins. Designate someone, even one or two people, every week who can check in on you via FaceTime. Postpartum can feel so isolating. That weekly check-in can do wonders."
"Give yourself the space to feel. You’re so open right now. Your antennas are up. You are hormonal, and it's such a tender moment and a time you really need to be gentle with yourself. Sit and be and feel all the things and reach out for all the help and accept all the help."