Can I Use CBD During Pregnancy? ‘Cause Gummies Are LIFE.

By Babe | Photo by @mer_mer_meredith

So you popped a Lord Jones CBD gummy last summer and things just got chill. You weren’t straight-up stoned, per se, but you felt calmer and better equipped to take on the day. And ever since, they’ve been your savior through all the hectic moments that come with adulting. Now you’re pregnant and scared that your one crutch is no longer OK, and it left you wondering, is CBD safe for pregnancy??

Let’s rewind for a second. Cannabidiol (CBD) is commonly referred to as the non-psychoactive component to THC, aka marijuana, aka weed. Tetrahydrocannabinol (THC)  is what gets you high, while CBD gives you a calming vibe that helps tackle insomnia, body pain, stress and a whole host of other physical and emotional issues. Here’s the thing, though. We know that THC during pregnancy is a big no-no – that it leads to low birthweight and a whole host of cognitive deficiencies, but what about pure CBD?

Gummies before, but what about during? The jury is out.
Photo courtesy of iStock ilbusca

The FDA strongly advises against the use of cannabidiol (CBD) as does the American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists, which recommends that women who are pregnant, or even thinking about getting pregnant, avoid THC “and any by-products” at all costs. When it comes to CBD, it’s a question of your comfort and the comfort level of your medical provider. While many OB’s will undoubtedly err on the side of caution, Dr. Shamsah Amersi, a Los Angeles-based OB-GYN who’s been practicing for over 22 years, often incorporates holistic alternate care to help treat the whole patient and recommends CBD as an organic, natural, and possibly even a safer solution to many traditional treatment methods.

“There are a lot of symptoms during pregnancy and postpartum  that are known to be ameliorated by CBD,” says Dr. Amersi. “For example, pregnant women often experience nausea due to morning sickness, pain, inflammation, swelling, muscle and back soreness, cramps, fatigue, stress, anxiety, and more. People use CBD for these conditions all the time. So why not do so while pregnant?”

The question of CBD continues post-delivery, too. We all know how beneficial CBD is on topical skincare products for hydration and its calming effects on sensitive, irritable skin. Well, there’s one entrepreneur looking to apply those same benefits to the family. Stephanie Pascarella recently launched Wash With Water, the first CBD skincare and sublinguals specifically crafted for mama’s self-care.

“Our topical CBD collection has been beneficial for so many women with skin condition changes, hormonal acne, dermatitis, as well as sensitive skin. CBD is one of most skin-loving ingredients in the botanical world in terms of hydration for the skin.” The sublingual line was designed with the purpose to provide solace in three major areas: sleep, stress, and self-care.

Dr. Meredith Grossman, an assistant professor in pediatrics at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai advises her patients against using CBD on their babies and children. “Because there are no studies demonstrating safety of these products in babies and children, I do not recommend them,” she says.

The bottom line is, do your research, and once you’re done nursing, feel free to pop it, slurp it and smoke it ‘til your heart’s content. Because one thing’s for sure – between potty-training, preschool applications, toddler meltdowns and the general headaches of parenting, you’re likely going to need it.

“I want women to know there’s a space for CBD to play a big part in their wellness journey.” says Stephanie.

More Ways Kids Are Using CBD:

ADHD

While research is still progressing on ADHD, for many diagnosed with this disorder, increased dopamine levels can often bring relief. Some treatments include raising dopamine levels in ways that can lead to burn-out over prolonged periods. On the flip side, CBD for ADHD has been reported to block the activity of gamma-Aminobutyric acid, which allows the body to increase dopamine levels and prevent possible burn-out naturally. A recent survey of people with ADHD using this method showed that 25% of patients felt relief using CBD for ADHD. As always, check in with your doc.

Autism

A retrospective study assessed the safety, tolerability, and efficacy of CBD as an adjuvant therapy, for problems in children with autism. Following the cannabis treatment, behavioural outbreaks were much improved or very much improved in 61% of patients. Anxiety and communication problems improved by 39% and 47% respectively. Disruptive behaviours were improved by 29% following the treatment. Parents reported less stress as reflected in the APSI (Autism Parenting Stress Index) scores, changing by 33%.

Seizures (Epilepsy)

Studies suggest that CBD may be an effective treatment for children with hard-to-treat epilepsy. In assessing the theory, researchers often look at how many people have a 50% or greater reduction in seizures. A recent evidence review found that one in every 8 people taking CBD would have a 50% or greater reduction in seizures. A much smaller number (less than 1 in 150) would become seizure free.

Source: Mary Jane Labs

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Pilar Guzman's Potluck No-Brainer. "You'll look like a f*ckin superhero."

If I need to make a last minute dessert, I take out store-bought pie dough and make a galette. It’s literally Pillsbury pie dough and whatever fruit you have.


Pilar Guzman

Heat the oven according to pie crust instructions, pour the equivalent of a basket and a half of berries or four pieces of small stone fruit (you can throw in a sprinkling of berries here too), slice and mix with the juice of a lemon and a tablespoon of sugar. Unfurl your pastry, place enough fruit in the center of the dough so that you can fold up the sides of it onto itself leaving a couple of inches in diameter of fruit exposed. Place on parchment on a cookie sheet and cook until the crust is golden and fruit is burbling and jammy. Make a second one while you are at it and you will look like a fucking super hero.

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Gender RevealGender Reveal

Is Life’s Biggest Surprise Worth Waiting For? Cue the gender reveal.

By Babe | Illustration by Ana Hard

In our series The Debate, our community of real moms tackle the pros and cons around the idea of the gender reveal. The truth is, like so many decisions around child rearing, there is no right or wrong answer. At HATCH, our job is to give voice to both sides of any debate, peppering real mom wisdom with the necessary facts so that you can make the best decision for you and your family.

For some women, the idea of waiting an entire pregnancy to find out the gender of their baby is absolutely ridiculous. After all, why wait when we have the technology available to us? Yet, for other women, their baby’s sex isn’t something worth knowing. Who cares about something as trite as gender when the baby is healthy and thriving? Particularly when one parent wants one a specific gender, the notion of “finding out” is a weighty proposition that’s almost too heavy to bear.

Let’s hear from our community of real mamas on their decisions surrounding whether or not they found out their baby’s gender. They share their experiences, below.

Need to Know Basis

Rebecca Mark
Contractor 
Charlie, 7 + William, 5

I just really needed to know. I needed to know and I can’t say why. What I do professionally, as a contractor, is me constantly looking 15 steps ahead. It’s my job to anticipate not just tomorrow, but what can happen in six months. It’s not that I went out and bought anything, but I just needed to know what I was getting into. I like to plan. I send out emails about my kids’ birthday parties months in advance. I can’t help myself. If something is happening in six months that I could know about, I need to know. It wasn’t so much about connecting with my baby or needing to name him, it was honestly about knowing what I was getting into.

I have an older sister who didn’t find out, and I was so astonished that she didn’t, that I remember thinking, well I’m definitely finding out. I usually do what she does, but it was one of those things. I mean, how can you not find out what’s in there if someone’s giving you an opportunity to find out? I always want more information. It doesn’t sound so profound when I say it out loud. It was about having a plan, and being able to look ahead.

I remember the moment I found out with my second son, William because I had my fingers crossed for a girl – both times. But that ship has sailed very permanently. When William’s doctor called, she said, “Well, at least one of them is a boy!!” And I said, “One of them? OMG what do you mean?” And she goes, “Oh, sorry Rebecca, I’m looking at the wrong chart! I know you’re dying to know, so I grabbed the information as quickly as I had it.”

I think being a mother of boys totally works for me. It came together. I definitely cried out of disappointment. I always pictured my life with girls. But I gave myself ample time to get over it and then got excited about it. I started getting excited about the idea of brothers and that sort of stuff, and I’m really happy about it.

Anyway, I was really glad I knew.

How To Celebrate If You’re Finding Out….

But We Love a Surprise

Jamie Stelter
Traffic anchor and a “Mornings on 1” co-host at NY1
Sunny, 2 + Story, 2 months

Everyone thought we were completely crazy for not finding out. They’d say, how could there be a thing that you can know and not want to know? But I always knew I wanted a surprise. My mom was surprised with all three of us, and I loved hearing her stories of the surprise. Plus I think because we did IVF and had a miscarriage before we finally had healthy pregnancies, that this would be the one fun, spontaneous part of this whole process.

The truth was that we weren’t going to do anything different. I love girls and boys in all prints, patterns and colors. I wasn’t going to buy a whole pink wardrobe, or paint the room pink or blue. Everything was going to be the same, regardless. So there was no real reason to find out. I just wanted a happy, healthy baby. We even had gender neutral names that we were going to use regardless. Of course it just happened to be that way, but it hammered the point home of who cares whether it’s a boy or girl? There is so much wrapped up into gender. I very much feel like why do we need to put girls in pink and set them all up for this pink tutu life? It feels very strange for me. 

When people have these crazy gender reveal parties, and they’re disappointed, how do you explain that to a child? They’re going to hear about it or see it. It’s strange to me to cheer on one or the other. For me a surprise was so much fun. Maybe I’m talking from having so many problems getting pregnant, but every baby is a miracle. So when I see people really wanting one or the other, it makes me uncomfortable. Maybe it’s the luxury of knowing that if you don’t have a girl this time, you can try again and have another girl, whereas my struggles took something I was already feeling and heightened it. 

With Sunny, everyone told us we were having a boy. They’d say your belly is shaped like a boy. Boy boy boy. Growing up I said I wanted five boys. I thought for sure that’s what my body was meant to create. I had a c-section, and when the doctor handed her over the curtain, I saw a plastic umbilical cord that I thought was a penis. I really thought she was a boy. So when they said girl, I was in shock. I was so deeply in shock. And then Brian and I started hysterical crying that we have a girl! It was very emotional. But it took me a second to be like OMG, we have a girl!

With my son Story, people were divided on what I was having. Every few days, we’d say it’s definitely a boy, it’s definitely a girl. I couldn’t make up my mind and then I had a planned c-section. When the doctor handed the baby to Brian, he said, “It’s a boy!” I truthfully didn’t care either way. What surprised me the most was that after having a girl, I couldn’t picture what having a boy would be like or feel like. I was surprised by how much I loved him. I only knew a daughter’s love so far. He’s only two months old but I already feel strong, beautiful differences in the two. I feel very very lucky.

How To Toast If You’re Staying Neutral….

Eight traditional signs of having a girl

You have morning sickness.
You suffer extreme mood swings.
You gain weight around the middle.
You’re carrying the baby high.
You experience more sugar cravings.
Your stress levels are higher.
Your baby's heartbeat is higher than 140 beats per minute.

Traditional signs of having a boy

Your baby's heartbeat is lower than 140 beats per minute.
You're carrying all out front.
You're carrying low.
You didn't suffer from morning sickness in your first trimester.
Your right breast is bigger than your left.
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Latham Thomas on What to Ask a Doula It's about experience + relationships.

For many women, the process of bringing on a doula can be a particularly stressful one. There’s the question of who, what, where, when, and how a doula will continue support throughout birth and beyond.

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So we’re bringing you From The Desk of a Doula, an ongoing series where we reach out to doulas in our network and community that can help answer your questions and offer us a glimpse into how they work, what they do and how their support goes way beyond the birthing experience.

First up is Mama Glow founder and maternal wellness expert, Latham Thomas, who’s served thousands of women on their pregnancy journey since 2003, when after giving birth to her son Fulano, she set out on a mission to help women reclaim birth. Since then, the New York-based wellness leader and master birth doula has been busy bridging the gap between optimal wellness, spiritual growth, and radical self care for a modern holistic lifestyle. We asked Latham if she could offer us some intel in finding the right doula for you, and the questions you should ask in advance to ensure your making the best choice for you and your baby.

According to Latham, you’ll want to find out a doula’s level of experience and their training. You’ll want to ask how many births they’ve attended and find out about their relationships with hospitals and doctors. She also recommends asking what other skills they can bring to the table in terms of support, such as massage, reiki, acupuncture, nutritional support or yoga. “Many doulas have layered skills to support you,” Latham says. “Because there’s no specific structure that supports this kind of work federally or otherwise, many doulas have to be versatile and have a lot of skill sets to differentiate themselves and to make ends meet.

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I have so many healing modalities that we bring extensive training on. The more skills your doula has in other areas, the better equipped you’ll be.”

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From there, Latham also recommends finding out how many clients a doula will take on at a given time, aka how many exist in one specific “birth window.” “If they’re doing quite a few at once, you might have to work with a backup if someone signed on before you goes into labor late,” says Latham. “So find out how they work with back-up and whether you’re able to meet their back-up doulas.” Beyond the obvious, which are references and testimonials, you’ll want to know the extent of their experience and how that might affect their price. “If someone is earlier in their practice, they may have discounted rates if that’s something you’re interested in,” Latham says.

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“You might want to be a part of them building their portfolio, or you might want more experience. Rates really are arbitrary but they go based on experience.”

Lastly, Latham suggests doing a deep dive into a doula’s outside relationships, such as practitioners, massage therapists, chiropractors, acupuncturists, and others in the healing space. “If you need a reference for a new doctor, it’s great to know your doula has that relationship and you can lean on them for that,” Latham says. “There will be instances where you can’t get an appointment and having someone in your support circle with a relationship with a provider is helpful. It’s hard to navigate the practitioner space and who’s who and what’s worth what? Someone who can say, ‘Yeah, here’s someone you can call for this and this is game-changing throughout your pregnancy and beyond.'”

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Gender Reveal

Is Life’s Biggest Surprise Worth Waiting For? Cue the gender reveal.

Brandi Sellerz on Navigating the First 40 Days. Ask for help.

By Brandi Sellerz | Photos courtesy of Brandi Sellerz

Brandi Sellerz had a life-changing epiphany after reading The First 40 Days, the essential guidebook on how to navigate those magical, insanely crazy days following birth. “It was one of those things where I read the book, and suddenly I had a glimpse into the next 40 years of my life and I pictured my mother, grandmother and all the women in my family,” says Brandi, a doula and founder of Not So Private Parts, a lifestyle platform dedicated to removing stigma associated with women’s health. “I didn’t know how their postpartum period went and I wanted to shift the paradigm and start the conversation, and started with me. It’s a sacred time, to take care of yourself after having a baby.” 

Brandi works with women all over the world in helping support their pregnancy journey, but her heart lies with the postpartum experience and how it impacts not just a mother’s physical health but her emotional health, too. As part of our ongoing series, From The Desk of a Doula, we reached out to Brandi to find out what moms can do during the first 40 days to help rest, restore and take a moment to pause with the help of those they love most.

Here Are Brandi's Tips, Below:

"Drink all the water, obviously."
"Allow people to help you and support you. If you can’t afford postpartum support or care, then lean on those friends who say, 'Hey! If you need anything….' Those are the people you respond with, 'Yes, I do.' Even if you don't, just have them come over and I can guarantee you they'll find something to do, even if it's holding the baby while you take a shower."
"This isn't a time to be by yourself in isolation. That’s what breaks my heart that during COVID-19, mamas don't have support right now. No one is coming over. Allow people to support you and love on you anyway they can. Allow people to check in on you. Even during this outbreak, allow people to FaceTime you and put their eyes on you. You'll feel so much better."
"Ask your friends and family to start a Meal Train, which organizes meal giving to those who need a little extra support. During the Coronavirus, they may not be able to bring you meals, but they could drop it at door. Also ask for weekly check-ins. Designate someone, even one or two people, every week who can check in on you via FaceTime. Postpartum can feel so isolating. That weekly check-in can do wonders."
"Give yourself the space to feel. You’re so open right now. Your antennas are up. You are hormonal, and it's such a tender moment and a time you really need to be gentle with yourself. Sit and be and feel all the things and reach out for all the help and accept all the help."
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Don’t Freak Out If Your Daughter’s Vagina Is Swollen Shut It happens.

By Babe | Illustration by Ana Hard

So your baby girl has a vagina that looks partially, or totally shut. It’s actually not that uncommon, so do your best not to stress. According to the Children’s Hospital Of Philadelphia, labial adhesions happen when the labia minora bind together forming one solid piece of tissue. These sort of adhesions can range from a 30-50% fusion to total closure. The causes are unknown but one potential reason is low estrogen levels in girls between three months and six years or inflammation.

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“Labial adhesions are fairly common in infants and young children, affecting up to three percent of girls in the second year of life,” says Dr. Meredith Grossman, an assistant professor in pediatrics at the Icahn School of Medicine at Mount Sinai. “With labial adhesions, the skin of the labia is fused together. They are managed with either emollients, such as Vaseline, or topical steroids or estrogen cream.”

Labial adhesions are fairly common in infants and young children, affecting up to three percent of girls in the second year of life.

Labial adhesions don’t come with symptoms and are usually uncovered during a routine exam. However girls may experience constant UTI’s as a result. According to Dr. Grossman, if the aforementioned emollients and creams do not work, “surgery is recommended,” she says. 

But yes, it’s totally normal, and it’s all going to be fine.

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Sofia Sanchez de Betak On Traveling with a Toddler Jet-set goals.

By Pilar Guzman | Photos courtesy of Sofia Sanchez

There are any number of blue-check personalities or stylish friends whose enviable continent-skipping lives you have to mute on the ‘gram  from time to time. And then there is Sofia Sanchez de Betak, aka Chufy, whose improbable pace and next-level adventures with her one-year-old daughter Sakura fall so far outside of FOMO’s earthly boundaries that you can only applaud her in between “likes.” The Argentinian-born multilingual polymath — art director, model, travel writer and now fashion designer — calls Paris, Mallorca, Buenos Aires, and, until recently, New York City home.

That’s in part to her own line of work as the creative director and designer of her travel-inspired eponymous fashion label Chufy and that of her husband, Alex de Betak, who produces and choreographs some of the fashion world’s highest profile shows. But in some ways she was born to live a peripatetic lifestyle: As the daughter of daughter of South America’’s most celebrated “travel fixer” Maita Barrenechea, Chufy spent her childhood traveling around the world with her mother as she scouted emerging destinations and off-the-beaten path experiences throughout Uruguay, Argentina, and Chile for her discerning clientele. She has carried on the tradition with what she calls, her “gypsy, hippie” lifestyle into adulthood, and now as a mother of one. 

We recently caught up with Sofia in New York and asked her about her philosophy–and hacks–around traveling with her (and without her) child.

We know you grew up traveling with your parents so taking a one-year-old around the world is less daunting to you than most. What’s your philosophy around traveling with babies and children? 

If we haven’t traveled to a place, or when we have ideas about things from afar or from an unknown cultural point of view that seems scary or different, it’s easy to have that vertigo feeling when thinking about traveling with a baby. I try to always remind myself and other people that mothers are mothers all over the world, raising their kids with all the same sets of fears and hopes around keeping them safe and fed, giving them good values, loving them. Cultural differences become less pronounced through the lens of motherhood. 

How important is it to you to expose your child to other cultures or even experiences closer to home that are outside of your/their comfort zone. 

I think it’s good to have a little bit of fear of the unknown and then come out on the other side of that, as we always do. No matter what ideas you might have about a place or a culture, you will almost always be surprised. If you never go anywhere out of fear of disrupting (and anywhere can mean going to different neighborhoods where your kids see people with different backgrounds, eat different foods), you will have a hermetically raised “Tupperware child” who doesn’t know how to deal with different situations and scenarios. And as far as the parent is concerned, I believe children shouldn’t be an impediment to exploration, adventures of any kind, they should be brought along for the ride. It’s important to remind yourself that kids grow up everywhere under all sorts of conditions, which should give you some sense of comfort that as long as you love and protect your kid, they will be okay. And I would argue, they’ll be better off for having been exposed to as many different circumstances and styles of child-rearing as possible. 

If your kids never see people of different backgrounds, you will have a hermetically raised “Tupperware child.”

Your mom is an award-winning travel agent who specializes in one-of-a-kind trips through South America. What was it like growing up traveling all the time and how did it shape you?

My parents both worked a lot, so I was thrown into the travel industry — it was a huge part of their lives and therefore of mine. Many times we went on scouting trips and many times we were brought along to a travel fair or hotel. Their travel lifestyle, which was a mix of work and pleasure but led with work, became our lifestyle. We are close and my parents chose to have us along with them, next to their life and their routines. If you have a life that takes you away from home, you have to make a choice as a parent. You either bring kids along for the adventure or you leave them at home. If you leave them at home, you lead parallel lives with your parents, which I think isn’t fair to them or to you. But there are trade-offs of course. Routines are great for kids and so we try to maintain certain rituals even when we are in different places. I am very lucky that I have a wonderful nanny who speaks many languages and who helps me maintain these routines when I’m working and when we are traveling. 

If you grow up seeing lots of things and being okay with change and uncertainty, you get to see the world through your parents’ eyes. Part of the learning as you get older is make your own decisions and opinions about things you first see with your parents. If you haven’t experienced as a fully formed adult what they’ve experienced it becomes just a concept. An unfounded concept. If you watch them and walk beside them and are empowered to have and express your own opinions then and when you are older, then you can make your own way. I’d like my child to see my lifestyle which is more hippie and let her make her own opinions in the world when she is older. 

Tell us about your recent trip to Everest, which we saw in your Instagram. 

I went to Everest for work. It was amazing to be able to have an opinion about it after reading and seeing so much about it over the years. I left Sakura for four days, which was hard but good for me and for her. Four days with her father is good for her. I think all couples should trade off parenting kids as much as possible. If you put the power of daily responsibility to only one parent, then they take over, no matter how hard you try to balance things.  I went to Everest base camp as an ambassador for Bally, which has deep roots in Alpine and expedition. Bally sponsored a major recycling and cleanup campaign expedition last spring after avalanches buried full camps under snow as well supplying oxygen tanks for sherpas. I was there to help promote that effort. 

I realized pretty much anyone can go to basecamp. It’s not expensive and you don’t need to get permits. Obviously it’s a different challenge if you want to summit. You really need two weeks. It’s quite intense. We did one day of hiking. While there were no earthquakes it was queuing that was the challenge.

My impression having spent only a few days is that people underestimate the earth’s challenges. We were going by helicopter to basecamp. Unfortunately, there wasn’t enough of a weather opening to go further. If I’m being honest, we all kind of underestimated the importance of the mountain. People go there to conquer it, but what I realized is that you have to respect the mountain. Like the ocean. Same with Antarctica. People who try to summit take off two months. You acclimate. Go up and down and get used to it. Acclimate yourself to the speed of weather movement–there is a storm in one moment and bright sun in the next. You realize everyone is like “hurry up and get a picture.” This particular season there was bad weather for long stretches. When the weather finally opened up this year , everyone went all at the same time. Normally the groups are staggered a bit, but because there was a backlog and because everyone had paid their $50,000, the guides felt obligated to let all 200 to 300 people up at once to compensate for the short opening. After waiting for so long, people felt they shouldn’t have to wait for another week, which is, of course, wrong. 

We all need to accept that we chose to take this risk and can’t rush nature. Also the government, not just the guides, should be really clear about the limitations. 

“I try to bring as little as I can and I wear only what’s comfortable.”

Where have you been with Sakura?

We’ve been to Mallorca, Paris, New York, London, Marrakesh, Mexico, Buenos Aires, Lima, Cusco, Costa Rica, St. Barths, Madrid, Emirates and Antigua. I went to India, Saudi and Qatar without her, then UAE with her. Crazy, I know!

Wow! How do you stay organized with all of your travels? 

Who said I’m organized! I have a spreadsheet. I also have a nanny who is with me and she goes home for 10 days every other month, or every month or when it fits both our schedules. She lives in Madrid. She comes with me everywhere. She goes from Paris to Madrid, came to Peru, Costa Rica. I recognize what a privilege that is every single day of my life. She is truly amazing.

What do you pack?

I used to travel with everything. Now I go pretty minimal when it comes to Sakura. I actually check a lot for myself and carry very little on the plane. I also try to leave a little in Paris and a little in New York. I travel with a big reusable bottle of water, which we fill up after security and share. I used to bring a blanket, not anymore. I used to travel with pants and socks for her, but now I only travel with onesies so I don’t lose things. Socks and shoes are the worst! One toy. At first I traveled with a bunch of toys, but then I realized that she’s more interested in or distracted by a seatbelt than anything I ever brought, so I learned to be a minimalist with her.  

What do you wear on the flight?

I try to bring as little as I can and I wear only what’s comfortable. A zipper boot or open loafer, or a slipper kind of shoe. Sometimes I wear a maxi dress and pajama pants underneath. I used to wear high-waisted jeans, but with the baby stepping on my stomach, I decided no jeans or anything with a tight waist. In the beginning I used to travel with a hundred things, now I pack almost nothing. If she gets dirty she gets dirty.

We are dying to hear about your trip to Machu Picchu with Luxury Collection, which we know was the inspiration behind your Peruvian line. Tell us about it. 

Sakura loves being outdoors. Everytime she sees the carrier she gets excited. Having been exposed to so many climates and cultures, traveling is just part of her character. I have a strong, sporty, cultured nanny who is super curious, which makes it super joyful and, frankly, possible especially when I have to work. One day we wanted to do an intense hike along the Inca Trail on the last day. My mom, who was with us, warned me that it wasn’t a good idea to do it with Sakura on my back, even though we had hiked part of it with her.  I’m glad we didn’t do it. It was a very intense hot day. Instead our nanny took her by train and we met her when we got to the top. We all got to enjoy it a lot more. 

What about the food?

She loved the food in Peru. It was a good way to get her into fish. We were there for six days.

What’s your schedule like on these trips?

We don’t really keep a consistent schedule or classes. It’s tricky because we move around so much. In Paris I found a Japanese calligrapher who mostly speaks Japanese to her. We do an art class. That’s my only thing that I’ve found stable in Paris. We tend to invite lots of kids over to our house to do group activities that we organize. We go to puppet theater. We take her to museum of natural history museum. We also recognize how portable she is at this age and that things will change as she gets older.  

Do you have any secrets to dining out?

While not everyone loves babies, lots of people do and are so sweet with Sakura. We go to places where we know the hostess and other staff, and especially if you go early when things are quiet, we find that so many people are willing to hold her or walk her around for a few minutes–just enough time for us to take a few bites. This has made her much more adaptable to different people, which we love.   

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The Dawn of the Digital Doula Samantha Huggins cares for clients from afar.

By Samantha Huggins | Photo courtesy of Samantha Huggins

Navigating birth and the postpartum space means learning a whole new way of doing things and a new language. Had you ever heard of a footmuff before becoming pregnant? Go ahead and google it, I can totally wait. As pregnant women you’re suddenly expected to be body AND baby literate and automatically know exactly what to ask at the right moment and from the right people.  More than ever, we could use a person in our corner that knows how to navigate and prepare for all of this. Someone who knows what to look out for and is on your side on a more intimate level. Enter the doula. 

What makes hiring a doula an obvious choice is reflected in the satisfaction rates of the people who have worked with doulas ahead of having their babies and living that newborn baby and parent life.  People are happier overall when they feel heard, supported and they understand what is happening to and around them. Doulas can help you and your family to achieve this by directing you towards information about the processes so that you can better think through what pathway you would like to create to achieve your birth and early parenthood goals.  

We are being asked more than ever what it is we do exactly and how we can help virtually. My coy but honest answer is, it depends.  Each client we work with will have a unique set of needs that we will address with them specifically. But in general, doulas are the preppers of preppers.  We are your biggest advocate in advocating for yourselves and we will get all “gym coach” on you or love you up as much as you need. And thanks to all of the great technology and the internet, we can do it digitally through a series of virtual meetings, through our robust resource lists, shared docs, phone calls, text and chat.  

Doulas are your biggest advocate in advocating for yourselves and we will get all “gym coach” on you or love you up as much as you need.

Here is what a doula can do virtually:

We plan with you:  If you have figured anything out about being pregnant, it’s that it’s time to plan. Outcomes, homecomings, babies that bring nothing to the party but themselves. Since it’s new territory for you but also a path walked by many, there are tons of options to consider and a lot of stories being shared that are meant to help you identify your set of preferences.  Your doula can help you tease out what will be helpful and empowering for you, for your labor and the postpartum time. From selecting your medical team to choosing your bouncy chair, doulas have their finger on the pulse of your local birthing community and can point you in the right direction when it comes to who and what to connect with.

We know what you need and what you do not when it comes to your nursery, your pantry, your closet and under your bathroom sink.  Hint: your registry is based on YOUR needs too. Going through your registry and all of its elements with your doula can help you to prepare for your baby in a way that will save you on managing returns and help to focus your energy on the products you actually will use versus the ones that just sound useful and end up taking up space and collecting dust. We all have an extra deep love for our delivery people but this is not who you want to be spending the bulk of your time with when you’re figuring out infant feeding with less sleep than you’re used to.

We educate you:  If there was a time to deep dive on evidence based information and weed out the internet fluff, this is it. Dr. Google is awesome but when we use this wild and vast tool to find the yes or no answers, we are often left feeling more confused than when we started our search. Your doula can help you source information that is evidence based, ethically collected and easily digestible. And if it’s outside of our wheelhouse, we will refer you back to that totally awesome midwife or doctor we helped you to connect with. We can also help you find the right classes to deepen your understanding of birth and how to change a diaper and when your class is over, you can circle back to us if you have any questions that were not covered in the original material. Want to learn more about birth, cooking for your postpartum, what postpartum can look like??? Ask a doula. We love a good book and article list and have a ton of great recommendations that are written with the intent of empowering you to elevate your experiences. 

We listen to you:  Doulas have a great ear. The first step in learning how to advocate for yourself is finding someone who has the time and energy to deeply listen without attachment. This is a tenet of doula work. You will know it when it’s happening because you can say something to us, receive an unflinching ear and then dig a little deeper. Now you have a chance to sit in this deeper space within yourself where your desires lay in wait. By allowing those thoughts to surface and then digesting that new material and teasing it out with your partner or a close friend, will help you to determine your family’s core goals and convictions on a macro level. Then your doula can offer suggestions to help break those goals down into smaller realistic ones and so on until a plan or list of preferences is identified and confidence is built. This can take days, weeks, months even. But what better to do that build a strong foundation and steady yourself the best you can while you’re growing little baby toes?

We are non-medical support and witnesses:  We do not offer advice in any therapeutic way that could impact the outcome of your health, the health of the pregnancy or your infant virtually or otherwise. We do offer a way back to your center. This means we can remind you throughout your birthing and postpartum processes that you are strong, that no means no without discussion, that there are options and that there is a way out of this space that might not feel good right now. Some families are giving birth where we can be virtually present via Facetime, Zoom, Whats App or other mode. Others are not. When we work with families virtually, we will plan for you to tune into us whenever and however it feels right for you. Often little check ins along the way, even by text, feels great and is like having an ally in your pocket. In the postpartum, we pick up again with long virtual hangs, infant feeding support and little teachings on all of our favorite tips and tricks.  

Navigating big life changes is big work. With an open mind, a deep breath and a little creativity, you will see that your lines of support and your own voice are with you. Doulas are here to support you. We have been and will continue to be.  

See you on the interwebs! 

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