Pregnant woman staring at the oceanPregnant woman staring at the ocean

Should We Still Be Worried About Zika? Before you book your babymoon...

By Ruthie Friedlander

Let’s get straight to it. You want to go on vacation. You want all the options. But your pesky great aunt is bringing up that “Z” word you thought disappeared with the pandemic. We’re breaking it down for you. Is Zika still a thing?

First things first, let’s get into what the Zika Virus is. The Zika virus originated in the forest in Uganda and emerged as a global concern in 2015 when it was associated with an increase in cases of microcephaly (that’s the condition where a baby’s head is significantly smaller than expected, often due to abnormal brain development) in newborns in Brazil. Zika spreads primarily through the bite of an infected Aedes species mosquito. However, it can also spread through sexual contact and from a pregnant woman to her fetus. Hence the purpose of this article.

According to the World Health Organization (WHO), the number of Zika virus cases peaked in 2016, with 750,000 reported cases worldwide. By 2019, this number had significantly decreased to just above 10,000 cases. Fast forward to today, in 2023, the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) states that Zika virus transmission is at an all-time low.

But before heading to Delta and booking a trip to just anywhere, while this may seem reassuring, it doesn’t mean we should completely let our guard down. The possibility of contraction still exists, especially for those in or traveling to high-risk areas, including parts of Africa, Southeast Asia, and the Pacific Islands. Expecting mamas and those trying to conceive should remain vigilant and adhere to preventative measures to reduce the chance of infection.

Dr. Goje, an OB/GYN specializing in infectious diseases, explains, “There’s been a massive decrease in reported Zika transmission, but some countries are still at risk. There is currently no vaccine to prevent or medicine to treat Zika.” So stay cautious.

Related: Can I Get the Covid-19 Vaccine if I’m Pregnant or Postpartum?

And for those trying to conceive, Dr. Goje suggests waiting for three months. “If a couple decides that they’re going to travel to a Zika destination, they will need to decide that they won’t try for pregnancy for the first three months that they’re back. This can mean abstaining from sex altogether or using contraception, like birth control or condoms.”

If you are heading somewhere with a higher Zika rate, there are some things you can do for prevention. Wearing proper insect repellent, covering exposed skin with long sleeves and pants, and sleeping indoors or in areas fully enclosed by screens or nets are great places to start.

So, is Zika something that should keep us awake at night? Based on current statistics and expert advice, the risk appears significantly less than it was a few years ago. However, prevention is always better than cure (to which there is none). If you’re planning a babymoon or a trip to a region with a history of Zika transmission, it’s a good idea to chat with your healthcare provider. They’ll help you understand the risks and preventive measures you can take to ensure a safe and healthy pregnancy journey.

Maternity leave for business ownersMaternity leave for business owners

Planning Your Maternity Leave When You’re Your Own Boss 5 steps straight from a mom-trepreneur.

By Ruthie Friedlander

Meet Julianne Fraser, a digital marketing guru who started her journey in the nascent stages of social media and influencer marketing. With her foresight and innovative strategies, she fast-tracked her career and began transforming global lifestyle brands at her agency, Dialogue New York. We’re talking brands like Seed, Brooklinen, Adidas, RE/DONE, Golde, Ghia, Sakara Life…the big guys and gals.

After five years of being in business, Julianne gave birth to her now fifteen-month-old daughter, Navy.

Julianne Fraser with new baby

“I think it was the biggest source of my fear and anxiety,” Julianne said when asked about her maternity leave planning process. “I was so nervous about losing my identity as a founder and entrepreneur.” She continued, “You hear stories like, ‘You’re not going to have a work ethic anymore,’ or ‘You’re going to lose clients!’ There are so many fake stories swirling.”

And these stories–however wild they may sound–lead lots of pregnant people to feel anxious, guilty, and unworthy of taking any maternity leave at all.

Working with a trusted business coach, Julianne decided to proactively take matters into her own hands.

First, she voiced her biggest fears, among which included:

  • My clients are all going to leave if I’m offline.
  • I’m not going to be able to focus on new business.
  • I’m so crucial in steering the ship of my team, and without me, things will fall apart.

“I was petrified,” Julianne confessed. “I’m really proud of what I’ve built. I just was so scared that I would wake up with no motivation. The reality: I’m more motivated, more productive, and my company is doing better than it’s ever done in six years after having my child.

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Here are the six steps she took (swears by and worked for her) to formulate a maternity leave as a founder/entrepreneur.

RELATED: 5 Mamas Talk Maternity Leave

Protect this precious time.

“I think people don’t consider how emotionally connected you’ll feel and how important this time is. Protect this precious time and do it unapologetically. For a long time, I thought I would work right through it. That would be fine for me. That was what I had to do as a business owner. I’m so grateful I took maternity leave. And for me, the five weeks I took was not long enough. To be able to be there and go through the craziness, the excitement, the emotion, and really turn off 100%. But remember, you’re the only one that will honor your boundaries. If you’re not going to uphold them, who will? Understand what your boundaries are, but also stick to them. There were times when I thought, ‘Maybe I’ll just get on that one call…’ But nope! I had made the decision that I was cherishing my time.”

Plan ahead.

“I did a huge push of new business, networking, getting coffees, and connecting with people to get as much excitement and opportunity as I possibly could about a month before Navy was born. During this time, I locked in three clients, all of which started when I came back. I needed to know that if this whole thing blew up, I still would have these three contracts waiting for me when I came back.

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“The second part of planning ahead was team training. We had one hour in the afternoon that we called ‘Julianne’s Maternity Training.’ It was literally in the calendar. We talked about the different dynamics of everything that goes on in my head—everything from client relationships to the different dynamics of the internal team. Talking about these EQ things that may seem fluffy was so much of a role. And it turned out it was something I could train. Every Friday, we’d talk about these aspects of client relationships and timelines. So, for example, looking ahead, when is this strategy due? Or, this client is launching a new product. Let’s make sure they have the proposal by this day.”

Develop systems.

“We put into place very clear systems that could automate the role I would typically play. For example, a set of questions to ask each Monday for each client. Are there any red flags? Are we falling behind on anything? Is there anything that’s not working that we need to revisit? We outlined those specific questions, and when the team met on Mondays, they’d ask those same questions without me having to be there. As much as I could systemize my role, the better.”

“My team would send me Friday recaps of anything I may want to know passively. So, if I chose to look at that email, I’d know things like, “Client loved the strategy” or “Client has a new CEO.

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” But only red flags. I didn’t ask for the nitty gritty. Just the big, concrete stuff. And I wouldn’t respond. It was really all so I could have on my radar.”

Transparency is key.

“Previously, I was so scared to be transparent with clients or my team. But I emailed all my clients, I told them the plan when I was out, who their point person was, who was handling what, and being very clear about what was happening in the future regarding deliverables. Clearly outline who will be in charge of what’s upcoming so there is no hesitation or uncertainty in how the maternity leave will be managed.”

Stick to your boundaries.

No one will enforce your boundaries but you. [It’s ultimately up to you to] protect your time off. Anticipate things will happen that are out of your control. That’s normal and expected. While I was out on maternity leave, we lost a big long-term client of ours [because of] shifting budgets. That was really disappointing. But know that you are going to have these moments. At the end of the day, there’s a solution to everything, so try not to catastrophize.

Be ready to adjust when you re-enter.

Maternity leave completely changed my company. Allow room for the growth that comes when you really delegate. Now, 15 months later, I’m not on every client call. I don’t oversee strategy anymore. I have looped in team members who help with new business. I am not managing everyone on this team. All these things that I held so close and told myself only I could do, being forced through maternity to delegate trust, empowered my team. I came back, and the strategies and client relations were even better. Our reputation and our feedback from clients are better than it’s ever been. And it’s because I just got out of the way and empowered people and trusted them. So, after your leave and your team has grown, don’t stifle that growth by coming in guns blazing. Let them take the lead and show you what they’ve improved while you’ve been out.

I think for my next child, if I’m lucky enough to have another child, it’ll be about remembering what good came of it. My role has immensely changed. After my maternity leave, I’m now focusing on growth and innovation for the agency, new business, and team mentorship. I’m not in the weeds of strategy. It’s just about having that trust in the people that you train and putting the work in to train them.

Twins breastfeedingTwins breastfeeding

Do I Need 2 of Everything if I'm Having Twins? TLDR: No.

By Ruthie Friedlander

Having twins can be twice the joy, but it can also mean that you’ll need to double up on certain baby registry items. If you’re in for the double whammy of joy ride preparing for twins, navigating through the dizzying world of baby registries can feel like trying to match socks in the dryer — nearly impossible. We’re here to be your guiding light in the land of pacifiers, onesies, and endless baby gear. Get ready to delve into our ultimate twin-sanity-saving guide, where we’ll give you the lowdown on what you need double of (yes, there’s quite a list!) and what can be shared between your soon-to-be dynamic duo. Because remember, sharing is caring, even in the womb!

Related: What Are My Chances of Having Twins?

What You’ll Need Two Of

Cribs: Each one of your babes will need a separate crib to reduce the risk of SIDS (Sudden Infant Death Syndrome) and to ensure each baby has their own safe and separate sleeping space.

Car Seats: It’s required by law to have one car seat per baby. Each car seat should be appropriate for the babies’ weights and heights. (Which you cannot assume will be the same, even with twins.)

High Chairs: When the babies start eating solid food, you’ll need a place to sit and eat in their own space.

Bouncy Seats/Swings: These are great for entertaining and soothing babies. Having one per babe allows each to be soothed or entertained at the same time and their own pace.

Bottles and Feeding Supplies: If you plan to bottle-feed, you must double the number of bottles, nipples, and other feeding supplies.

Baby Carriers/Slings: If you and your partner or helper plan to carry your babies simultaneously, you’ll need two carriers. Nope. You can’t squeeze them both in one.

What You Can Registry for One Of

Changing Table: Despite your superheroine tendencies, you can only change one baby’s diaper at a time, so a single changing table should be sufficient.

Diaper Pail: A single diaper pail should be ok. It can hold multiple diapers at once before needing to be emptied.

Nursing/Feeding Pillow: Special pillows are designed to accommodate twins if you’re breastfeeding. If you’re bottle-feeding, one pillow can be used for both babies at different times.

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Baby Clothes: While you’ll undoubtedly need more clothes than if you had a single baby, you don’t necessarily need two of each exact item. That’s just personal preference.

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You’ll likely receive a lot of clothes as gifts, and babies grow quickly, so it’s often more practical to have a variety of sizes rather than duplicates of the same size.

Toys and Books: Babies can share toys and books. You don’t need duplicates of every toy or book, as babies often enjoy playing with different toys at different times.

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Save the “equal duplication gift rule” for when they’re teens.

Bathtime Supplies: Items like shampoo, soap, and towels don’t need to be duplicated. Sharing supplies is practical parenting.

Health Supplies: First aid kits, thermometers, nail clippers, and other health and grooming supplies can be shared.

Breast Pump and Accessories: You won’t need two pumps or sets of accessories if breastfeeding and pumping. You’ll use the pump at different times for each baby.

It’s important to remember that every family’s needs will vary, and what works for one set of twins may not work for another. Consider your unique situation and seek advice from other parents of multiples to help decide what’s suitable for your growing fam.

All better coAll better co

It Does Exist: A Pen That Stops The Scratching! + it's safe for you and babe.

By Ruthie Friedlander

We all know that as moms, we constantly seek out those ‘lifesaver’ products that can keep up with the crazy whirlwind of our daily lives. Here’s the good news: We’ve found one such gem and can’t wait to share it with you all. It’s the ‘Don’t Scratch That Pen’ from All Better Co. And we guarantee, once you use it, you won’t leave home without it. 

Let’s talk about this little wizard in a bottle. The ‘Don’t Scratch That Pen’ is one of those rare gems that multitasks just as much as we do. Be it an annoying itch from a bug bite, a minor skin irritation, or even those pesky rashes with a knack for appearing out of nowhere, this handy little pen has got you covered.

Related: OMG Is This a Tick Bite

What’s amazing about the ‘Don’t Scratch That Pen’ is that it’s not just for us grown-ups but also the babes in our lives. Its gentle formula is perfect for their sensitive skin, alleviating discomfort, reducing redness, and encouraging healing. So, yes, it’s like carrying a mini first-aid kit in your purse!

All Better Co. is known for their commitment to using only safe and natural ingredients. The ‘Don’t Scratch That Pen’ follows suit, containing only skin-loving, non-toxic ingredients. And the best part? It actually works!

As moms, we know there are countless products out there that promise relief but rarely deliver. With the ‘Don’t Scratch That Pen’, it’s different. The cooling, soothing sensation it provides upon application works almost instantly to calm the itch, and its regular use helps promote healthier skin.

It’s as much a summer essential, helping with those pesky mosquito bites, as it is a winter necessity, aiding with dry, itchy skin. It’s a product that promises and delivers year-round comfort.

With its pen-like design, application is a breeze — no mess, no fuss, no tears, just quick relief. 

In a nutshell, All Better Co.’s ‘Don’t Scratch That Pen’ has earned our ‘Mom Seal of Approval.’ It’s that reliable buddy every mama needs in her toolkit, making both her life, and her kiddos’ lives, a whole lot easier. It’s more than just a product; it’s peace of mind. And as a mom, isn’t that what we’re all seeking?

So here’s to fewer itches, less discomfort, and more smiles! Say hello to your new best friend, Mamas — ‘Don’t Scratch That Pen’. Here’s to happier skin days for you and your little ones. After all, when Mama’s happy, everybody’s happy. Now, isn’t that the sweetest thing?

Until next time, ladies. Keep shining, keep smiling, and above all, keep mothering like the rockstars you are.

Can I Use an Infrared Sauna? + 5 other wellness trends we need safety checks on.

By Ruthie Friedlander | Illustration by Ana Hard

Welcome to your curated guide to navigating wellness trends. If you’re on Instagram, or TikTok, or breathing… You probably are seeing the cold plunges, deliciously relaxing saunas, and borderline bizarre trends popping up. (No judgments here, ever!)

The bottom line: ALWAYS ask your OB/GYN before trying ANYTHING. You may be surprised by the risks seemingly simple things like adaptogen-infused drinks may cause. 

We know you want to make the best decisions for you and your growing babe, and we’re here to help shed some light on what’s safe and beneficial for your pregnancy wellness journey. From the ancient healing practices of acupuncture to the modern (slightly fratty?) rituals of cold plunges, we’ve gathered insights from top health experts to guide you through the do’s and don’ts. Whether you’re curious about herbal healing or lymphatic drainage, our goal is to help you make informed decisions that suit your unique needs during this particular time. So cozy up, and let’s get into it.

Related: Can I Stay On My Antidepressants?

Herbal Healing

Sage + Sound’s Paul Kempisty (who counts Gwyneth Paltrow as one of his clients) tells us, “Herbal and botanical remedies have been used for thousands of years to support health and wellness, women’s health, fertility, pregnancy and postpartum. It’s always recommended to work with an experienced and licensed herbal practitioner, and this is especially true during pregnancy when many of the foundational do’s and don’ts need to be adapted to the specific needs of a pregnant woman.”
TLDR: Maybe, but check with your OB/GYN to ensure you’re asking the right questions about your practitioner’s training.

Acupuncture

Acupuncture is a safe and effective modality that can address many health concerns and symptoms during pregnancy,” Paul says. “Acupuncture stimulates the body’s innate healing and adaptive responses. Many women have already experienced the benefits of acupuncture as they try to conceive or regulate their menstrual cycles, and they often continue with their acupuncture care during their pregnancies. Acupuncture is a reliable non-pharmaceutical tool for dealing with pregnancy-related issues like morning sickness, muscle aches, joint pains, anxiety, restless legs, insomnia, allergies, headaches etc.”
TLDR: YES, QUEEN!

Cold Plunges

Cold plunges, while invigorating and potentially beneficial for circulation, could induce thermal stress that isn’t ideal during pregnancy. According to Remedy Place, known for its iconic ice plunges, pregnant people should avoid this practice. It’s generally recommended to avoid them. Always consult your healthcare provider before introducing new activities during pregnancy to ensure they’re safe for you and your baby.”
TLDR: Sorry, babe.

Steam Rooms

The American College of Obstetricians and Gynecologists (ACOG) is clear on this now. While steam rooms can be super relaxing, the high temperatures can lead to overheating, which isn’t recommended during pregnancy. It’s better to opt for a warm bath or shower, which can offer relaxation without the potential risks.
TLDR: Sorry, babe.

Infrared Saunas

When it comes to Infrared saunas, see above. Like traditional saunas and steam rooms, a sauna of any kind may elevate body temperature to levels that could potentially harm the fetus, especially in the first trimester. As a rule of thumb, it’s best to avoid activities that cause overheating during pregnancy.
TLDR: Sorry, babe.

Lymphatic Drainage

According to the National Institute of Health, lymphatic drainage can be beneficial in reducing swelling and discomfort during pregnancy, particularly in the second and third trimester. However, finding a practitioner trained in prenatal care is essential to ensure the procedure is performed safely and effectively.”
TLDR: Maybe, but check with your OB/GYN to ensure you’re asking the right questions about your practitioner’s training.

Woman holding baby ShadowWoman holding baby Shadow

Can You Have Postpartum Depression as a Non-Carrying Parent? We spoke to Elizabeth Baron, LMHC.

By Ruthie Friedlander | Photo by @ashleegadd

For as long as I can remember, the center of my life has focused on my health. It’s oscillated between me being focused religiously on keeping up healthy habits (eating right, working out) to feeling sorry for myself that my body doesn’t perform the way I want it to, the way I perceive everyone else’s does. 

When my friends started having babies, when I started watching their bodies shapeshift and create life, next to being incredibly excited, my thought first was, “My body cannot handle that.” I just felt it in my gut.

This gut feeling was confirmed by several medical and mental health professionals, most of whom wouldn’t directly tell me not to try to get pregnant but instead would say things like, “If you were my daughter, I’d look into other options.” Or, “We could do this, but you’ll have to be at the cardiologist weekly.” The idea that the doctor thought HE (of course, he) was “doing” anything in and of itself baffled me. This was my underperforming body we were talking about. There’s no “we” there.

The popular narrative is that you try everything until there are no other options, but I felt like I had tried everything to feel healthy and failed for the past 30+ years. Why not use this as a chance to change the script? Why not start from a place of planning versus waiting for failure and disappointment?

My (incredibly amazing and supportive) husband and I ultimately went down the complex, wild (insert pretty much any adjective here) surrogacy path. And next month, we’re expecting a baby girl. The process has been bizarre and beautiful, and I am so excited to become a mother. I’ve read all the articles (on Babe, of course). I’ve started assembling the nursery (cute crib sheet ideas, anyone?). I’ve figured out how to respond to the misinformed people who show concern when I tell them I’ll be formula feeding…

And, yet, as the reality of becoming a parent inches closer, I find myself grappling with a new set of health concerns, this time centered around my mental well-being. The anticipation of our child has, expectedly, stirred up a whirlwind of emotions, from joy to anxiety and fear. As a person who’s always been acutely aware of my physical and mental health, I started to wonder: Sure, it’s normal to be anxious about change, but the big stuff, the big “P” — POSTPARTUM … Is it possible that something could be happening to me even though I’m not carrying? Might be susceptible, too?

Cue my go-to: call a doctor. I spoke to Elizabeth Baron, LMHC, about this and more on what chemical or mental effects non-carrying parents can anticipate and plan for. Here is what I’ve learned.

Can you explain what postpartum depression is and how it might affect non-carrying parents?

I first want to introduce the acronym PMADs, which stands for perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMAD). Let’s be sure to use this terminology rather than “postpartum depression” because there are more mental health conditions, in addition to depression, that can arise during the perinatal period and for non-carrying parents, too. PMADs, or perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, are a group of illnesses that affect at least 1 in 5 women during pregnancy and the postpartum period. Those of us who do this work know that it’s more like 1 in 3, yet roughly half of the women struggling with their mental health after pregnancy do not receive treatment due to a lack of awareness about symptoms and treatments, an inability to access resources, and often stigma.

PMADs include depression, anxiety, OCD, PTSD, and, in the most severe cases, psychosis. PMADs cause emotional and physical challenges that make it hard for women to function adequately and care for themselves, their babies, and their families. 

There are several risk factors. While there is a genetic and biological component to PMADs, and you are at greater risk if you have a history of mental illness or someone in your family does, there are several other risk factors that we want to be paying attention to, especially for non-carrying parents. If someone struggles with stressful life events or circumstances such as financial hardship, relationship issues, physical/sexual abuse, or substance use, they are more likely to develop a PMAD. In addition, if someone has decided to have a baby and be non-carrying, possibly because of recent, recurring, or unresolved loss, they are more likely to experience a PMAD. 

How common is post-partum depression in non-biological parents, such as adoptive parents or those who used surrogates?

I think there’s even more pressure on adoptive parents or those who have used surrogates to minimize their more challenging emotional experiences due to societal pressure and potentially internalized pressure. For example, those who are adopting or who have used surrogates might spend the pregnancy anticipating what it’s going to feel like to meet their baby in similar ways to those who are carrying, yet, non-carrying parents have a whole host of additional worries that such as, “Will we be just as connected if I were carrying?” or “Will the baby know I am the parent?” These are totally understandable worries and non-carrying parents deserve just as much time as those who carry to bond and get to know each other. If this worry continues, persists, and impacts a parent’s functioning, we want to be thinking about a potential PMAD at play. 

And our beloved pops? What about dads?

While PPD in dads is not as well documented, research suggests that between 4 and 25 percent of first-time dads suffer from PPD. Depression is also highly linked with anxiety; about half of people diagnosed with major depressive disorder are also diagnosed with at least one anxiety disorder. Bringing a baby home is also a massive shift for dads and can hit men equally as hard. Some new fathers feel under increasing social pressure to be involved in their children’s lives from the get-go, many return to  work immediately and some dads can simply feel isolated in their experiences, as gender roles have influenced the idea that “men don’t talk about feelings.” Men, too, struggle with a sense of guilt, inadequacy and feelings of sadness, and we have to make space for them as well. It’s a wonderful time in the postpartum period to initiate couples therapy with a perinatal professional to [hit] pause, listen to one another, and process this massive life shift for your family. 

What strategies can non-carrying parents use to manage and mitigate PMADs?

Individual therapy, support groups, and finding community are really important tools to combat PMADs. The good news is PMADs are 100% treatable with the right treatment. Finding a support group or attending group therapy during this time period, especially for those non-carrying is the most powerful intervention to protect against mental health challenges. To feel less alone and to sit with those who have truly walked in your shoes can feel so supportive and uplifting. 

How can friends and family members support non-carrying parents experiencing PMADs?

When you ask how it’s going, truly ask the new mom how she is doing. We already know how the baby is sleeping – not very much! 

When a mom enters the postpartum period, carrying or not, she receives an abundance of often well-meaning text messages such as, “OMG, he’s here!!” or “She’s adorable!” and “Can’t wait to meet her, more pictures please!” But behind the scenes, the new mom is trying to manage everything and keep a baby alive while processing this massive shift in her life. Try and focus directly on moms’ well-being, offering tangible support and more of an understanding of how to truly show up in an entirely different way – a mom-first way. 

My favorite way you can help a family or friend going through PMADs is to figure out how to help without adding more pressure and stress to her plate. Give her concrete options, such as: 

  1. Can I wash bottles for you?
  2. Want me to hold the baby while you shower?
  3. Can I take your toddler out to the swings later today?
  4. Got time for a hug?

Can you describe any specific treatment options or therapeutic approaches that effectively deal with PMADs?

Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a form of Cognitive Behavior therapy designed by Dr. Marsha Linehan to treat a broad range of complicated symptoms and concerns. It is a highly effective treatment to help women struggling with PMADs. 

It helps us tolerate challenging opposing feelings that exist all at the same time. I want to invite a non-carrying mother to engage in DBT to help them learn to continuously practice language that promotes “both-and” rather than feeling like they can only experience one feeling, one emotion, and one truth at a time. We, as humans, experience a wide range of emotions constantly. Sometimes moms with PMADs need a bit more help practicing this… 

This might look like:

“I did not carry this baby AND I am grateful for his/her arrival.”

“I did not carry this baby AND I am a wonderful mother.”

“I could not carry this baby AND I am good enough.” 

Can non-carrying parents take any preventative measures to reduce their risk of PMADs?

Finding supportive therapy and a support group is an important preventive measure that non-carrying parents can take to reduce their risk of PMADs. Having a baby through gestational surrogacy can feel exciting AND (hi, DBT :)) also stressful and lonely. Group support, such as the one linked here, provides space for intended parents to process the emotions accompanying gestational surrogacy, meet others in the same boat, and expand their awareness of their goals- and maybe get some extra help with logistics too, such as the unique experience of preparing for a baby who might be born in a different state!

Related: Maternal Mental Health Apps Worth Downloading

Elizabeth Baron is a licensed mental health counselor and psychotherapist, specializing in
maternal mental health. She received her master’s degree in counseling psychology from
Columbia University’s Teachers College and has extensive clinical experience in supporting
women in all stages of their motherhood journeys— from preconception and pregnancy, through
postpartum and parenting.

She began her career as a psychotherapist at The Motherhood Center of New York (TMC),
where she developed her expertise in treating Perinatal Mood and Anxiety Disorders. In addition
to her clinical role at TMC she also served as the community lead and collaborated with
organizations and parent communities to host educational events and support circles. In 2020
she started her private practice where she offers emotional support, resources, and strategies to
women and families navigating their experiences into and through motherhood.

Deeply committed to destigmatizing maternal mental health issues on a global scale, Elizabeth
has also worked with several brands in the motherhood and parenting space and has appeared
on numerous expert panels, podcasts, and webinars. In Spring 2023, she is relaunching With
Elizabeth, a digital platform dedicated to building community online and in-person through
expert-led education, interactive group sessions, and strategic partnerships with other brands
and specialists. Her goal is to help moms and parents feel less alone, understand the
complexity of their experience, and have the space to process the emotional and mental load
associated with becoming parents and raising children.

Elizabeth lives in NYC with her husband and two young daughters, a preschooler and an infant.

Baby using skiphop playBaby using skiphop play

5 Things Are *Actually* Okay to Buy Used for Your Nursery She's a sustainable AND eco-friendly mama!

By Ruthie Friedlander

We’re all about making parenthood as stress-free as possible. And today, we’re here to let you in on a little secret: sometimes, the best items for your nursery aren’t the brand-new, shiny ones. Websites like Rebelstork are revolutionizing how we shop for our little ones, offering high-quality, gently used items that promise safety, reliability, and, most importantly, fantastic value for money.

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They call it “recommerce”: an umbrella term for overstock, open box (a.k.a. returned or liquidated) and gently used products. Think of it like The Real Real, but for baby gear, with guaranteed safety measures.

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From cribs to strollers, Rebelstork is your go-to platform for getting great deals on all that expensive stuff you want but feel guilty buying for such short-term use or can’t afford.

Related: You Don’t Need Three Bouncy Things On Your Registry

Some fun stats? According to Rebelstorks 2023 Annual Baby Gear Recommerce Report:

59% of shoppers surveyed said the top reason for buying recommence is value

27% said they turned to recommence for baby items due to rising inflation — to stretch their budgets and generate extra income by monetizing items they no longer use.

59% of parents surveyed said they are opening their minds to open box because they have pride in knowing they are saving a never-used (simply returned) item from a landfill.

Sound good? Great. Now, let’s explore the specific categories of items that are perfect to buy at recommerce.

Strollers

We all know that top-tier strollers can come with a hefty price tag when bought brand new. But here’s the thing: your little one won’t stay little forever. They grow and change faster than you can imagine, and soon, that expensive stroller might not be getting the mileage you’d hoped for. Enter: recommerce. It’s a win-win situation: You get the reliability and safety of a top-notch stroller without the hefty price tag, and you’re embracing a more sustainable choice. Now, isn’t that simply smart parenting?

Bassinets

Let’s talk bassinets. These cozy little nests are essential for your newborn’s first few months, but let’s face it, they outgrow them faster than it takes for you to remind your mother-in-law of boundaries. So, why invest in a brand-new bassinet when you can opt for a gently-used one from a recommerce site? Not only will you be saving a pretty penny, but you’ll also be getting a bassinet that’s been safety-checked and is just as snug and comfy as a new one. Plus, by buying pre-loved, you’re making a sustainable choice that’s good for our planet.

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Earth mamas, can I get a WOO WOO?

Carriers

Baby carriers: the ultimate accessory for the parent who’s got places to be and a baby who’s coming with. But let’s be real, some of these baby-toting contraptions can cost an arm and a leg – and you need those for carrying the baby! you can find a wide range of high-quality, gently-used baby carriers at a fraction of the original cost. Not only does shopping for your carrier save you money, but it also supports a more sustainable way of shopping. And, like everything on the site, each carrier is safety-checked to ensure it’s ready for more baby-wearing adventures.

Bouncers

Picture this: You sipping your coffee, watching your baby bounce, and mentally patting yourself on the back for making a savvy, eco-friendly choice. Considering the lifespan of the essential bouncer, you’re not going to want to break the bank on this item.

High Chairs

“But, ew! Isn’t there, like, other people’s babies’ food stuck on there?” Reminder people: These are exhaustedly vetted products, a mix of overstock, open-box, and resold baby gear, most of which has never ever been taken out of their boxes. Rest assured: not stale rice sticking to the bottom of these high chairs.

egg symbolizing fertilityegg symbolizing fertility

Everything You Need To Know About Egg Donation The why, the what, the how, and so much more...

By Cofertility | Photo via Stocksy

Navigating the complex world of egg donation can be overwhelming, with many questions, concerns, and information to process. And it’s not necessarily the coziest topic to chat about. That’s why we have teamed up with Cofertility, a leading authority in the ever-changing fertility space, to give you all the 411 on egg donation.

Founded on empowerment, education, and empathy principles, Cofertility aims to democratize fertility information and support individuals and couples on their fertility journey. Their holistic approach, coupled with their innovative egg-sharing model, allows for a more inclusive, compassionate, and ethically balanced egg donation method, fostering a healthier environment for donors and recipients.

Here, we asked Lauren Makler, CEO and co-founder of Cofertility.com, about the what, why, and how of egg donation.

Let’s start simple. What is egg donation, and how does it work? 

Egg donation is when a woman donates eggs to someone who can’t otherwise conceive. With egg donation, a donor’s eggs are retrieved and given to the intended parents, who can then fertilize them for their use. The donor’s ovaries are stimulated to create mature follicles during the egg retrieval process. Once the eggs reach peak maturity, they’re extracted from the ovaries and fertilized with sperm to create embryos. 

What are the most common reasons for seeking donor eggs? 

Egg donation can benefit many individuals and families who cannot otherwise conceive – like people who struggle with infertility, gay men, women with age-related diminished ovarian reserve, cancer survivors, and more. The CDC estimates a fifth of women encounter infertility every year, and there is a growing number of LGBTQ+ couples building their families through egg donation. Egg donation is a true gift to these individuals and families. 

With Cofertility’s approach, which allows women to freeze their eggs for free when they donate half of the eggs retrieved to a family who can’t otherwise conceive, egg donation can also benefit the donor. Not only is there the satisfaction of helping someone else grow their family, which can be incredibly powerful, it is also a jumpstart on their own future reproductive planning. 

What are the criteria for becoming an egg donor? 

There are official disqualifications based on regulations by the FDA and discretionary disqualifications based on recommendations by governing bodies like the American Society for Reproductive Medicine (ASRM). Among other factors, egg donors must have both ovaries, be between the ages of 21 and 34, be physically and emotionally healthy with no genetic or reproductive disorders/abnormalities, be a non-smoker, and abstain from drugs. Other disqualifying factors can result from your or your biological family’s medical history, and you can find more information and a more thorough list on our website.

Are there any potential risks associated with the egg donation process? 

Overall, egg donation is considered a low-risk procedure. There are also a number of steps along the way designed to ensure the donor’s health and safety. A 2017 study found that overall complication rates were just 0.4%. Serious side effects and complications, including ovarian torsion, intraperitoneal hemorrhage, severe Ovarian Hyperstimulation Syndrome (OHSS), and infection, are rare. For the most part, a donor may experience minor side effects – like bloating, constipation, and nausea – from the medications and egg retrieval

What is the legal and ethical framework surrounding egg donation in different countries? 

There are a lot of stigmas around egg donation in the United States, which we believe is rooted mainly in the cash compensation model. Intended parents often must scroll through spreadsheet lists of donors or work through services that over-emphasize classist attributes and looks with little opportunity to understand the donors’ values, backgrounds, and personalities – things intended parents want to know and that donors care about sharing too. It’s for this reason that the industry has faced backlash for being unethical and even predatory. Egg donation can feel transactional, impersonal and, for lack of a better word, “icky” for everyone involved. But it doesn’t have to be that way.

At Cofertility, we take a firm stance against the historical, predatory practices that involve cash compensation and failing to provide fertility education for the donor’s own reproductive future. In the egg-sharing model, which is what our Split program offers, there is a focus on shared outcomes rather than financial gain. Our members receive education and have choices throughout the process.

In terms of the legal framework, this varies widely across the United States and globally. A Third-Party Reproduction Lawyer, or Fertility Lawyer, who specializes in the legal aspects of fertility treatments that involve the use of donor sperm, eggs, or embryos, helps donors and intended parents navigate the complex issues that can arise and guides on the legal rights and responsibilities of all parties involved. Currently, in the US, no uniform standards exist about proper donor recruitment, care, and disclosure methods, so laws can vary from state to state. Donors cannot be paid in other countries, like the UK, Canada, and China. In Mexico and Spain, donations must be anonymous, unlike in Ireland and the UK, where they must be disclosed. In other countries, donor eggs are not allowed at all by law.

How does the egg retrieval process occur, and what can a donor expect during this procedure? 

In a typical menstrual cycle, you’ll have one mature follicle that releases an egg for ovulation. The egg-freezing process tricks your ovaries into sending a whole crop of mature eggs into the world in one go. During the procedure, medications are used to stimulate eggs to grow. Those eggs are then retrieved from the ovaries and combined with sperm to create an embryo to be used for fertility treatments. It’s a 10-14 day process where you’re closely monitored by your doctor throughout. We have a lot of more resources on our website, cofertility.com/freeze, to walk you through what to expect. Cofertility also offers members access to a community of women going through the process at the same time in addition to the specific instructions and support they’ll get from their clinic!

What are the potential emotional and psychological considerations for egg donors before and after the donation? 

Helping bring a new human into this world is a huge deal, and we think potential donors should thoughtfully consider the opportunity and its implications before making a decision.

Emotional side effects can vary from person to person and depend on their expectations and understanding of the experience. Many women find the experience rewarding and fulfilling, knowing that they have helped someone else start or expand their family. However, some women may experience more complicated feelings about it. This is why donors undergo psychological screenings and why we strongly believe it’s essential to have a support system in place for the process. For our members, we offer a cohort of other women going through the experience at the same time, too. 

We know egg donation isn’t for everyone, and that’s okay – it’s essential to think it through fully and ensure you’re all in before moving forward. That’s why we also have our Keep program, for those still interested in freezing their eggs to do so more affordably.

Can an egg donor have any future involvement or contact with the child born from their donated eggs? 

It’s critically essential for donors to think about the relationship they want with the intended parents and any children born from their eggs, and options range on a broad spectrum. While the fertility industry has historically relied on secrecy and anonymity, more research shows the benefits of intended parents being open with children about their donor-conceived roots. Our stance is that in a world of ubiquitous genetic testing, no donation can be guaranteed to be anonymous. This is something that we make our Split members aware of and is part of why we encourage our intended parents to be open with their children about their conception story. We work with everyone involved to build a relationship that feels right for them and encourage both donors and intended parents to consider the donor-conceived person’s best interest, too.

We offer two options for a relationship: undisclosed and disclosed. In an undisclosed relationship, donors and intended parents do not exchange contact information and only communicate through Cofertility or your egg donation service. That communication can include things like sharing a photo of the baby when s/he is born, communicating meaningful updates such as first words, or as simple as just asking about medical questions if they arise. In a disclosed relationship, donors and intended parents exchange contact information and can communicate directly. The scope and degree of communication are what both parties make of it. Families may share an annual holiday card with their donor, communicate around milestone events, from first steps to graduations, or even facilitate direct communication between the donor and any donor-conceived children. On the other end of the spectrum, you may also decide to keep direct communication to a minimum but keep the lines open if a need or issue arises. 

Are there any long-term health implications for egg donors? 

The hormones used to stimulate the ovaries to produce multiple eggs for freezing are similar to those used in fertility treatments and are generally considered safe. There is currently no scientific evidence to suggest that egg freezing or donation increases the risk of cancer, including invasive ovarian and breast cancers. There is also no evidence to show that freezing or donating eggs will impact an individual’s future fertility. 

If a donor has concerns about the potential risks of egg freezing, it’s important to discuss these with a fertility doctor who can provide personalized advice based on individual health history and circumstances.

How does the compensation process work for egg donors, and what factors determine the amount they receive?

With the cash compensation model, on average, women are compensated around $10,000 and up for their donations. The amount can vary based on a variety of factors, including age, physical appearance, ethnic background, location, and more, but also things like their education and profession. Repeat donors can also receive higher compensation, though it means a donor’s children could someday have more genetic half-siblings.

It’s a largely unregulated market and has led to some sketchy practices. ASRM has said that egg donor compensation can open the door for exploitation, and that’s why we are proud of our egg-sharing model that brings more ethics and transparency to the industry. If intended parents are looking for an egg donor, it can already feel like the odds are stacked against them. The last thing they need is to feel like they are “shopping” for a human who plays a critical role in their family-building journey. By allowing donors to freeze their eggs as part of the process, our unique model honors everyone involved.

You can learn more about egg donation and Cofertility by heading to Cofertility.com.

Melissa Wood does yoga with her babyMelissa Wood does yoga with her baby

Inside Melissa Wood's 30-Day Prenatal Fundamentals Attention fabulous mamas-to-be and postnatal warriors everywhere!

By Baby | Photos by Melissa Wood Health

Roll out the red carpet and grab your favorite wellness smoothie because we’re about to dive headfirst into an enlightening tête-à-tête with the one and only Melissa Wood of Melissa Wood Health (MWH). We’re getting the inside scoop on Melissa’s game-changing 30-Day Prenatal Fundamentals Program, a fitness fiesta specifically designed for the fabulous mamas-to-be and the brave warriors in the postnatal phase.

Melissa, a wellness guru, supermom, and the queen of balanced living, is here to spill the beans on how motherhood reshaped her fitness philosophy and led her to create a program that’s as flexible as a yoga master and accessible as your favorite pair of leggings. So, whether you’re an expecting mama looking for a fitness program that actually fits into your lifestyle, a new mom trying to navigate the postnatal fitness landscape, or just someone who loves a good wellness tip, this interview is your golden ticket. Prepare to be inspired, educated, and maybe even join a new community.

Read: Melissa Wood-Tepperberg On Letting Go Of Birth Plans

Has your approach to fitness changed since you became a mother?

Absolutely. I used to believe you had to torture yourself during your workouts to experience results, which mentally impacted the rest of my lifestyle. I knew there had to be another way. Once I had my first child, I needed something that I could do while he napped in a short amount of time but was still effective. In those micro-moments, I focused on slowing everything down and committed to my daily meditation and movement practice whenever I could. I now know, and constantly share with my community, that “some minutes are better than no minutes,” and it’s more about consistently showing up for yourself every day.

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That is how I started to see my true transformation; it is also why I create workouts you can do whenever, wherever you are.
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Some of my favorite series are using a park bench after walking the kids to school or a standing series alongside a stroller. Making mindful movement accessible and attainable for all (especially our expecting and new moms) is what MWH is all about!

What was helpful to you during your postpartum experience in terms of getting back into fitness?

First, it is so important not to fall into the trap of thinking you need to get your “body back.” I believe there’s no going back, only forward, and we need to honor our body’s needs during this delicate time. Second, as I said before, some minutes are better than no minutes. Don’t focus on how long you move your body and instead, just focus on doing something every day that makes you feel good. And, you will start to see how a 20 min full body flow or even a 10-minute arm series has you feeling great. It’s all about consistency to help us feel our absolute best in mind and body. And third, take it slow. This is a very personal chapter in your life. Go at your own pace. Don’t feel rushed or pressured. And listen to your body.

Related: 5 Mamas Talk Fitness

What made you create programming specific to pre and postnatal chapters of life?

Creating pre and postnatal content became so important to me as a Mom because, during this time in our lives, we experience our bodies changing so dramatically. And, as I started sharing [my own] content, MWH members were so drawn in and gave the best feedback, mostly just wanting more! This type of programming is unique, along with all of the content on MWH, as it centers the mind/body connection and is focused on slow, controlled movements using both pilates and yoga principles to help you feel your best.

Can you walk us through an example of some of the types of classes the 30-Day Program has?

The 30-Day Prenatal Fundamentals program has everything from yoga and pilates flows, arms and lower body series, side-lying series, core and pelvic floor series, round ligament support, tension release, labor prep, and more! It is so important to maintain both physical and mental strength during your pregnancy. This program is the perfect guide if you’re looking for a place to start, want motivation with a built-in schedule, or anything in between.

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[Our members] love programs! They have reported that all sorts of lengths of programs work, but for prenatal specifically, giving a longer timespan allows you to connect with the movement deeply. This program features classes from me and two of our pre and postnatal-focused Creators, Nikki and Amanda, which provides you an opportunity to discover what works best for you. MWH is about meeting yourself where you are. So, if you miss a day or skip a day, that is all welcome here. Every day is a new opportunity to begin again, and that’s the message we share with our members.

What can you expect to get out of the program?

MWH guides you to build a better, stronger relationship with yourself. With this program, you can expect to move, feel good, and learn more about your body during pregnancy.

Who is an ideal candidate for the 30-Day program?

The 30-Day Prenatal Fundamentals is specially curated for mamas-to-be. Experience a mix of full-body flows and targeted series to help you move through this transformative time in your life. During what can be a sensitive time, we want to provide support. Pregnancy affects us all differently–use this as a baseline to find what kind of movement works best for you, and please consult your doctor if you have any concerns. This program and the entire MWH platform guide you through all stages of your life… with meditations, workouts, nutrition, and lifestyle content to help you feel your best.

Sign up for Melissa Wood Health’s Prenatal Fundamentals here.

Sandy Beach DollSandy Beach Doll

A Doll You Can Bring To The Beach And Not Destroy. Meet the Sandy Beach Doll.

By Babe | Photos by Sandy Beach Doll

Imagine this: a golden sun high in the sky, the embrace of warm sand beneath your feet, and the perfume of saltwater filling the air. What’s that? The kids? Oh, darling, they’re taken care of. They’re not screaming for a side of fries or whining about sunscreen. Instead, your sweet babe is nearby, their laughter the perfect beachside soundtrack as they’re immersed in play with their new bestie – the Sandy Beach Doll. Now doesn’t that sound like a slice of summertime bliss?

Mamas, you’re not dreaming.

The Sandy Beach Doll is no ordinary plaything for a day by the sea. To quote Kacey, one of the brand’s three founders, “Sandy Beach Doll is the first-ever doll designed specifically for water and beach play. Its charm lies in its ingenious reimagination of the classic ‘pail and shovel’ sand toy. Sandy, lovingly made using high-quality materials, promises hours of fun, from filling it up with sand and water at the beach to bubbly playtimes in the tub and beyond.”

Related: The 9 Items You Need for a Day at the Beach with Babe

And the muse behind Sandy? “The idea for Sandy was born from cherished childhood memories and has been reinvented for 21st-century play, inspiring a new wave of children with its ground-breaking design,” Kacey shares.

Sandy Beach Doll Founder with kids
Kacey, beachside with her daughters and their Sandy Beach Dolls.

This summer, as your little ones dive headfirst into a world of make-believe, they’ll simultaneously hone crucial skills like hand-eye coordination, dexterity, and imagination. Kacey explains, “Sandy Beach Doll is not just a toy, but an instrument of learning.”

Kacey, a mom to two toddlers, intimately understands the pivotal role toys play in children’s development. That’s why she and her co-founders designed the product with a keen eye on growth and development.

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Beyond the obvious physical benefits, Sandy Beach Doll is also fashioned to encourage dramatic play among kids. They can explore in different scenarios, imitate life, and experiment with fresh ideas and emotions in a nurturing environment.

But let’s not forget about you, mama.

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This is Babe, after all. We get it. Kacey, a mom herself, devised Sandy with you (yes, you) in mind. “We want to “wow” our tiny customers while ensuring that playtime with Sandy Beach Doll is a breeze.” With Sandy, water play is a joy and is a cinch to clean up. Translation: No knotted hair, moldy materials, and absolutely no tantrum-triggering wait times for drying.

Related: How Amanda Seyfried and Her Two Best Friends Are Innovating Child’s Play

And let’s talk style, shall we? Sand? Well, she’s a burgeoning style icon. “We wanted Sandy to be fashionable!

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Inspired by my daughters, we designed Sandy in chic muted bathing suits, matching flower sunglasses for the doll and the child, shovel, stickers, and a waterproof beach tote for seamless packing for all adventures.”

So here’s the crux of it: Parents, the Sandy Beach Doll is more than a doll; it’s an opportunity to elevate your children’s summer experiences while making yours a tad simpler and a whole lot tidier. Here’s to a summer brimming with sunshine, sandcastles, and blissfully untangled doll hair!

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