Model and Entrepreneur Lindsay Ellingson Talks Healing & Birth Plans.

Model turned clean beauty entrepreneur is spending her days preparing for the arrival of her baby while working on Wander Beauty from her family home in Ohio amidst C19. We caught up with this stunning mother-to-be as she shares healing after a miscarriage, the power of meditation, why a little beauty goes a long way, plus adjusting to living and working remotely. @lindsellingson @wander_beauty

“I feel like I have been pregnant for nearly a year and a half.”

Your road to pregnancy?

Last January, we got pregnant with my first very quickly and I thought it was going to be smooth sailing. However, much to the surprise, at week 16, my water broke early and immediately put on bed rest. I was in complete denial and insisted nothing was wrong while praying that everything was going to be OK. Sadly, in the end, it wasn’t, and the loss of my baby was the most gut-wrenching soul-crushing experience. While miscarriages are hard no matter when it was especially difficult given how far along I was and had seen sonograms of her sucking her thumb. In the weeks that followed, as I searched for answers they couldn’t tell me why we lost her, which was extremely difficult to accept. They called it a premature rupture of the membrane (PPROM), which can be caused by an infection but I had no signs of fever. After going through the worst of it, I was exhausted and felt as though I’d run a marathon only just as I was getting to the finish line someone picked me up and placed me back at the start. 

Between pregnancies, I dedicated myself to meditation. To heal, I learned to surrender and let go of control. I was never able to meditate until I discovered Gabby Bernstein. I fell in love with her voice and would listen to her guided meditations every morning and night while imagining myself holding my baby. We waited a few months before trying again but there was nothing I wanted more than to be pregnant again. Fortunately, I was able to get pregnant relatively soon after; there was nothing I wanted more. We were very lucky and in some ways, I feel like I manifested our baby. 

Cravings?

This pregnancy, in comparison, has been wonderful, super smooth, and very healthy. Overall, I have felt good, especially now. During my first trimester, I had a ton of food aversions and was tired all the time. By my second trimester, my lack of appetite and exhaustion leveled out. Now that I’m in my third trimester and in the home stretch, I’ve been having the most bizarre cravings like citrus! I’ll have crushed ice with an entire lemon or peel a lemon as if it was an orange and eat it straight. Also, anything sweet. I’ve been baking banana muffins and apple crisps on the regular. I try to make them healthy with whole wheat flour and alternative sugars, but also I’m letting myself indulge. 

Fitness, much?

It’s been hard at times to feel motivated working out from home, but I try to do something each day.. I’ve done yoga and pilates for years, where it’s been all about the core  but I find pregnancy fitness confusing…now I’m just supposed to work out my glutes? I don’t get it. However, Ballet Beautiful has been a great resource for online streaming classes. Another quarantine friendly workout has been Sweat With Bec’s Booty Band, which I brought with me to Ohio.. And to end our days, we usually take a walk around the lake at sunset.

Birth plan?

When COVID started to escalate in NYC we left for my husband’s family’s home in Ohio to wade out the worst of it, never expecting to be gone this long. Now that we’re getting close to our due date, I’m torn about where to give birth. Our local family doctor can deliver our son and will take me at a moment’s notice, although I really want to have him in NYC. We’re waiting a bit longer to see how things go but I have to decide shortly. That said, the bright side of delivering in Ohio is our family’s here which will be an incredible support. 

Growing up I had terrible scoliosis that required spinal fusion surgery. My entire spine is fused with metal rods to straighten out my back therefore it’s been explained to me that an epidural may not work although I won’t know until I’m in labor. In light of potentially having an unmedicated birth, I’ve been doing hypnobirthing classes in hopes of managing the pain, otherwise, the alternative is a C-section, which I’d like to avoid if possible. My goal is to labor as long as I can at home and then go to the hospital. Unfortunately, I’ve heard tons of stories about how unbearable the experience is, which has stuck with me. Why do women only share traumatic stories? I feel like you rarely hear about a blissful birth. That said, I’ve heard hypnobirthing can be really powerful and taps into your body’s natural ability to let go of fear and relax to do what it’s meant to do. One thing I’ve learned from hypnobirthing is to listen to the positive affirmations and block out the negative stories because everyone’s experience is so different. Perhaps this is solid advice for life too. Even during times of crisis, there are always positive stories and it’s important to seek those out. 

Reading?

Recently I asked my community what books I should be reading. I received so many incredible recommendations but the number one book suggested was Ina May’s Guide To Childbirth, followed by On Becoming Babywise – both are on my list to read. Currently, I’m reading the Happiest Baby by Harvey Karp. 

Listening?

As for podcasts I try to keep it positive. I love Oprah’s SuperSoul Sundays, and Tony Robbins is great too. Plus, I listen to Pregnancy Confidential religiously; a 5 minute podcast with info on the different stages of your body and baby. 

New normal routine?

My day starts around 7:30 with a healthy breakfast, and my one, very precious, cup of coffee. After which I jump into work for most of the day with a few breaks here and there wherein I stand up, walk around, breathe, and practice my hypnobirthing. In addition to modeling, I’m the Co-founder and Creative Director of Wander Beauty. I do most of our product photography and work with an amazing team tocreate all the content for our launches and social channels. Luckily I was able to set up a little studio here at our lake house that has beautiful light so I can still shoot all the products we need to support our launches. I’m a self-taught photographer and editor and have really enjoyed this time to focus and be creative. To best work from home, I was able to create a work area separate from where we eat and live, which for me is really important. Plus, I’m so grateful for my team who is making all of this possible on a daily basis as we adjust to working remotely; everyone has been amazing through this process. 

New normal dress-code?

For the first few weeks of shelter-in, I was living in leggings but after a certain point, I had enough. Now, I make an effort to get dressed every morning and put on a little makeup. My go-tos have been my HATCH pink gingham dress and blue gingham top. Plus, I do a quick five-minute mood-boosting routine with our Dualist Concealer, On-the-Glow Blush and Illuminator, and a little mascara. Putting a touch of color on my face and wearing a dress makes a world of difference in my confidence and productivity. 

Love your line, tell us more…?

I launched Wander Beauty with my partner, Divya Gugnani, a serial entrepreneur, and mom of two. When we met, I was traveling the world modeling and working with the most amazing makeup artists all over the world. My makeup education came from long days on set learning from the best and I brought all of that clean beauty knowledge to our brand. When we started to brainstorm the evolution of beauty, I felt no one was speaking to the woman on the go. Every brand had too many steps and it wasn’t practical. We wanted to create a line of clean beauty that was multifunctional and meant to simplify your routine to keep you gorgeous on the go. We’ve found this really resonates with women, especially new moms as it’s easy to use and looks natural. A touch of blush, a little mascara and you’re good to go.  

Maternity leave?

Hard to plan into that between COVID and my business. As a Co-founder, I don’t want to be away from the team too long but I’ll likely check out for the first month and re-engage in the second. I want to stay in touch with my team as much as I can, but also want to fully be with my baby. Overall I’m so excited to start this new chapter. For so long I have been so focused on my career and myself, it’s wonderful to finally take a step back and begin our family. 

“To heal, I learned to surrender and let go of control.”

Any advice?

Healing from my miscarriage and navigating the uncertainty of my second pregnancy forced me to surrender and stay in the moment, which has been such a powerful learning. Therefore, I can’t say enough about finding strength in leaning on your community, meditating, and doing yoga.

Brooklyn Decker On Running Her Company While Raising Money At 8 Months Pregnant

Down to earth, bright, and very real, Brooklyn Decker is a hyper-mobile powerhouse.  The self-proclaimed actress, that’s “moonlighting” as a tech entrepreneur and co-founder of Finery— a platform that catalogs your online buys and manages your closet is living in Austin, but always on a plane between LA and NYC. With her two careers, a toddler, and a baby, Brooklyn is never not in motion. On a recent trip to NYC, I caught up with her to chat about what she’s learned in business, why most women will spend more on clothes than education in their lifetime, plus babies, breastfeeding, and her bicoastal company. @brooklyndecker

Current state of mind?

Harried. Frazzled. My 6 month old doesn’t sleep at night — I might possibly be losing my mind, but otherwise in total bliss.

Eating habits? 

I’m not one to deny myself of much, so I’ve always been a big proponent of everything in moderation. I’m a grazer  I eat small meals all day long. (Thank you, breastfeeding!) 

Wellness routine?

Truthfully, there isn’t much of a routine these days! Between having a toddler, a 6 month old, and a third baby (Finery) I really don’t have the time. I’m currently on a workcation and did a little day trip to Sequoia National Park yesterday  embarrassingly enough, that hike was my first workout since having my daughter, Stevie. I’m 31 so I’m starting to research facials, anti-aging routines, etc.. I just haven’t committed to anything yet. 

Exercise routine? 

Hahahahahahahahahahaha. Exercise? hahahahahahha. That’s hilarious.

On body and boobs:

I used to have a very large boobs, but after breastfeeding my son for a long while, and now nursing Stevie, all the life has been fully sucked out of them. I’m thrilled about it! I was never a fan of my chest – so droopier, smaller boobs make me very happy. These days, my body is in limbo and all about function – it’s used for carry children and all the stuff that comes along with them. 

On women supporting women: 

We need to vote with our dollar. Buy products created by women, support businesses started by women, see movies directed by women. Obviously I’m biased here, but that includes our technology. Are we using tech built by women, for women? The only way to start seeing solutions for the pain points in our lives is to build them ourselves- or support those who do. The more we support each other, the more opportunities will be created for other women down the road. 

On Finery and what’s next:

I’m an actor, and I moonlight as a tech entrepreneur. We have iTunes for music, netflix for our entertainment, online banking for our finances, what do we have for our clothing? Nada. Women will spend more money on their clothes than their education (yes, shocking) and there’s nothing out there to help us maximize the stuff we have. We all crave order organization with our stuff – Finally Finery does that for you. We did a big raise in December (when I was 8 months pregnant!) and we just finished a huge redesign. We optimized our UI/UX, and added some much needed features to our product.

On taking maternity leave as an integral part of Finery?

I didn’t take maternity leave, but that was my choice. I don’t go into the office every day (our team is based in NYC) but I’m always a ping away. This is what’s cool about having a female run company, as we all understand the complexities of life. Yes, we’re a tech company, and yes, we’re working around the clock. But, we all support the need for each other to check out on occasion. We cover if someone has a family vacation, or an anniversary, or a sick kid. There’s a level of empathy and understanding that makes it a dreamy situation for a mom. I’ve taken many conference calls with a baby attached to my boob and everyone just gets it. 

Learned in business?  

So. So much. The acronyms. Dear God, the acronyms. Also– if you don’t have the answer for something, just ask. People love to help. 

A bit of advice…

I’m still learning and there’s still plenty of time for me to mess it up, but my mom gave me some great advice which I try to live by: Your children just need to know you love them unconditionally. That’s your main job. That was very simple and liberating for me. I can be messing up dinner, tummy time, milestones, etc. but as long as they know I love them,  it’s all okay. 

The Escape Moment Every Mom Needs. Just drive.

“Go on a drive. 30-40 minutes a day, just you and the open road. A simple car ride gives me time away from my kids, with my music, away from homeschooling, Zoom conferences and the ever piling mess in the kitchen. I also smoke a secret cigarette.

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– Ann C.

Zoe Winkler Reinis On This Is About Humanity, The Power Of Community, And Learning As We Go

In the wake of her recent trip to the California/Mexico border (along with supporters like Scooter Braun, Benny Blanco, Amber Heard, Zoe Saldana, Ashlee Margolis, plus Clare Vivier and others) we caught up with this good-hearted mama of three. Here, she talks This Is About Humanity and its efforts in helping separated families in Mexico, as well as the power of community, and learning as we go (both in life and motherhood). @zoe.winkler.reinis @ThisIsAboutHumanity

Tell us about This Is About Humanity?

This is About Humanity is a movement geared towards raising awareness on refugees, migrants and asylum seekers at the border. We aim to educate others to be allies and advocates on behalf of this population through first-hand experiences at the border and educational salons. We also host dinners throughout the year to raise money for legal services for these asylum seekers as well as improvements to the shelters where they are currently housed. Plus, we support and work with separated and reunited families.

Why did you go on this mission to Mexico?

On Wednesday morning January 30th at 6 am, as part of our efforts to bring relief to the separated families in Mexico, we made our way to visit three different shelters in Tijuana. One for unaccompanied minors (kids who cross alone), one for women and children and one for families. We took 53 people on a bus who were willing to listen and bear witness to the humanitarian crisis happening south of the border. It was an incredibly emotional day filled with highs and lows. This particular trip was our third one and our most significant to date.

How did you begin this work?

When the family separation issues began, I could not let it go and had to do something. I’d been introduced to Elsa Marie Collins numerous times through mutual friends, and I saw she was collecting supplies for the families separated. I reached out to Elsa to become her westside liaison and began gathering supplies from all of the mamas in my neighborhood. The outpour was incredible, and every day endless boxes of supplies were sent to my house.

When we had enough to truck down, we asked people to help pack up the truck with the supplies via a post on Instagram. Countless unexpected people came and helped; the support was phenomenal. We separated everything to go between South West Key, which is the detention facility, Border Angles, and Casa Cornelia Law Center. A dear friend and mom Shannon Wollack gifted us her U-Haul and driver for all the boxes, and separately we rode down on a bus with 30 people. Upon arrival, we set up a lunch with speakers from The ACLU, Border Angels, and families affected by the deportation in San Diego.

On that first trip to Mexico, Elsa came up with the name This Is About Humanity, and since then Elsa, Yolanda Selene Walther-Meade (Elsa’s sister), and I started as three moms working tirelessly together to make a change and bring awareness to the humanitarian crisis at the border. Every step of the way has evolved organically. From that point on, we came up with our next idea to do a salon, followed by a dinner party at my parents’ house where we raised over 100K for The Immigrant Defenders—more than they’ve ever made in one night.

Why focus on Mexico?

I believe this is not a political issue, but a human rights issue. While I recognize that we have homeless problems here in the US that need addressing, the difference is we’re not separating those families from each other or taking away their right to live here. Every single person we saw at the detention center has left the comfort of their home because they’re afraid for their lives. No one chooses to walk for three months and be homeless unless you’re desperate for change and a better life. At the end of 2018, nearly 250 children were still being detained, according to government data analyzed by the American Civil Liberties Union. An Amnesty International report showed that more than 6,000 people, including at least 3,000 children, were separated from family members from late spring to the middle of August. It’s reason enough to take action.

On our recent trip, we went to each shelter and assessed what they need so we can adequately raise money and provide for them. With past fundraising, we have built a bathroom at one of the facilities, and we’re planning to install a playroom at another center.

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That’s incredible work. Can you describe the living conditions?

It was difficult to see the way these families are living. Each family gets one tent, ONE TENT for their entire unit and all of their belongings, no matter how many people they are—be it six or two! Moreover, the shelter for women and children has only 40 beds, and 130 people are living there, so they sleep on mats on the floor.

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What were you doing before This Is About Humanity?

I’ve always had a passion for children. I was a preschool teacher for over ten years. When I had my oldest son Ace, I decided to become a stay-at-home mom. However, when he was nine months, I got this incredible opportunity to work as a Therapeutic companion. Along with my best friend, we were hired by parents to go into their children’s school and shadow their kids throughout the day for social and emotional development alongside their curriculum. We were a great team as I worked a few days a week with the child and then she would take over for the remaining days so that neither of us worked a full week. It was fantastic.

Do you believe in the power of community?

Absolutely! Recently Paola Mendoza, who is fighting the good fight in NY, emailed me at 5:50 AM and said a woman she had been following through the caravan was in danger and needed money to move into a hotel. She was a single mom of four kids, one of whom was a four-month-old that was very ill with a fever and in urgent need of medical help. Paola asked me to raise $2000 to get her into safety. I immediately emailed ten moms asking for their support of $100 each and I would kick in $1000. By 7 am that morning (less than two hours later) I had raised ,500 which was double what was asked of us.

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It’s insane what moms can do when they come together on an issue. I was proud that people wanted to help and we were able to get the job done swiftly. Two days later Rosa was in a hotel.

You take care of everyone else. When and how do you care for yourself?

I’m exhausted all the time. However, I just started working out again. I used to hate going to the gym but now I’m enjoying it, plus I got a trainer who has changed the game for me. My husband and I have also been trying to put our phones down from 5:30 pm, when we get home until the kids go to bed around 8:30 pm. The idea here is to prioritize quality time with them and each other. I’ve been realizing more and more that this time with them is short and it’s essential to focus on being a family. There are days when I lose it, days that I am present and days that I’m ready to check out, but it’s fleeting nonetheless because there’ll come a day that we’ll look back and wish we still had babies.

Best and worst part of parenthood?

My parents have always said to me that being a parent is hard. To their point, life would be much easier if we just said ‘yes’ to everything our kids wanted. However, it’s doing the real work that shapes and molds them into quality people. Sometimes there are fights that you have to fight, even if you don’t want to. However, they’re necessary. My top priority is that I raise kind and considerate humans with a strong sense of self; this is all that matters.

Best and worst part of raising kids in LA?

I can’t imagine raising kids in NYC. I have three boys, and when they get home from school, I open the door and let them run around like animals outside. Life is easy here. I also have an incredible, life-changing nanny. Plus, my parents and my husband’s parents are very involved. It takes a tribe.

Advice…

The perfect mom is imperfect. I find this sentiment very reassuring as we all put so much pressure on ourselves to be perfect. However, that’s not what it’s about, and the truth is we’re all learning as we go. I found it hardest to go from zero to one kid because I always stressed about “getting it wrong,” and I was nervous about every little thing. However, with each new baby, I’ve realized that we’re bound to make mistakes and that’s OK. With that understanding, I’ve become a better parent. If only we could all learn to parent our first like our second, or better yet, third!

For more information on how you can get involved, please reach out to @ThisIsAboutHumanity

tenoverten's Nadine Abramcyk on Self-Care at Home Hint: coconut oil, brown sugar scrubs and baths.

By Nadine Abramcyk | Photo by @_minta_maria_

As a co-founder of luxury nail care and clean beauty brand tenoverten and a dear friend to the peeps at HATCH, Nadine Abramcyk knows a thing or two about self-care. More so, she’s known for having a killer DIY, all natural regimen that we can emulate at home with a simple trip to the pantry. So, in the spirit of quarantining, we asked Nadine to hook up some pointers on maintaining self-care in the age of Covid, and how she manages to squeeze it in amidst the million other things on her plate. Because we all deserve a little moment to ourselves.

So, Nadine….given that we’re all in quarantine, and many of us are working, homeschooling and 24/7 parenting, how do you sneak in the time for self-care? Do you maintain specific routines as in you practice self-care at specific times of day? Or does it fluctuate day-to-day?

It’s such an interesting time to be alive, right? My definition of self-care pre Corona has sort of flown out the window and the stillness of this new normal has really forced me to take a look at what’s a real contributor to my overall well-being. That being said, there are some things that have stuck and others that have flown by the wayside.

I know, for example, that if I don’t get some sort of movement in, first thing in the morning, that I set myself up for a less productive day and I simply won’t get it in. I need that energy boost in the morning to carry me through and shake off the sludge from the night. Whether it is a long walk around the neighborhood, a quick jog or streaming a fitness class…it can come in any form and doesn’t require sweat. The other thing I know about myself is that my digestion and gut health are huge contributors to how I feel in general so I never go without taking a probiotic along with some other supplements that are especially good for my makeup each morning. This is typically followed by a large green juice or smoothie if I am feeling I need something more substantive in the morning. During these times, it has been harder to get fresh greens so I have resorted to a combination of frozen greens and chlorella tablets to supplement where needed. Needless to say if I don’t do these three things in the morning – movement, supplements, and juice, then they likely won’t happen. And that’s OK because tomorrow is a new day.

Legs up the wall before bedtime helps with blood circulation and is a nice way to force yourself away from the screen and into a relaxing mindset.

What are the essential self-care rituals that you have not sacrificed, even during these troubling times? What are your can’t-live-without moments, techniques, products? What have you let slide and even given up on for the time being? Is there anything you’ve totally let go of in the age of Covid-19?

When I have the time for real self-care rituals, the thing I cherish the most in these new times is a bath. A simple one, with no fancy soak, just plenty of epsom salts and a palo santo stick to burn nearby. This has been my most cherished self-care ritual during quarantine. I also can’t live without my gua sha stone. While salons are closed and facials are a thing of the past, this simple tool and five minutes are incredibly relaxing and release a great amount of facial tension almost immediately. I’ve had to say goodbye to facials, lymphatic drain massages, workouts in heated sweat-inducing rooms but will hopefully get back to those one day. The ritual I have rediscovered is a simple legs up the wall before bedtime. It helps with blood circulation and is such a nice way to force yourself away from the screen and into a relaxing mindset. I cherish sleep now more than ever.

Can you recommend 5 self-care recipes or techniques using everyday items from the pantry or around the house that women can source without having to purchase or go buy?

  • A simple cuticle and hand scrub using a teaspoon of brown sugar in a tablespoon of olive oil creates the most divine paste that exfoliates your cuticles and hands leaving them feeling softer than ever.
  • Apply coconut oil to your heels at bedtime for smooth feet that make you feel like you haven’t missed a pedicure.
  • A DIY face mask that I like is made up of equal parts honey and oats with 1/2 avocado.
  • Kate Bock has the most insane hair and posted her DIY hair mask which I tried and loved – it is an egg white, juice of half a lemon and 2 tbsp of honey. Apply on hair and leave for 30 minutes before showering.
  • And because I’ve been getting inundated with questions from friends on at-home nail care and this has come up several times, if you need to treat a nail fungus while stuck at home, apply tea tree oil, which is naturally antibacterial and really works when applied daily for several weeks.

For those of us who can’t seem to fit in self-care, do you have any advice on the most effective and efficient way to get there? 

Start with five minutes and find the thing that resonates with you the most. Whether it’s waking up to a warm cup of water with lemon while sitting down with yourself and letting your mind wander for a bit, or throwing your legs up the wall while putting your kid to bed, or even once a week making a date with yourself to plan something you enjoy that just takes care of you and no one else. It doesn’t have to be huge. Consistency in whatever it is matters much more.

How has self-care impacted your general outlook during these stressful times?

I feel more aligned with myself and patient when I practice even the smallest moments of self care. I use that as a touchstone during these stressful times to remind myself of what matters most, our health and family. That fuels me to get up everyday with a renewed energy to emerge from this pandemic brighter for myself and all others that I come in contact with. If I didn’t take quiet moments with myself each day, I am sure my mind would be more scattered and my days would feel even more overwhelming. Simply put, self-care helps me gain perspective.

Parenthood By The Numbers We did the math.

By Babe | Photo courtesy of iStock Good Moments

By the time you have middle schoolers, you sort of wish you could divert all of those gift funds frittered away on onesies and baby dresses (which you donated before the tags every came off) toward the mushrooming costs of raising kids.

According to the most recent study by the US Department of Agriculture, it costs an estimated $233,000 to get one kid from conception to college. “People know there is a cost to raising a child, but they often are encouraged to create families without considering the financial impact,” says Noah Rosenfard, a Florida-based CPA. “Parents want to become grandparents, women want to become mothers, men want to become fathers. It’s in our DNA. I’ve often heard people say, ‘It’s never a good time to have kids, just do it and you’ll figure it out.” 

Of course, there are serious caveats around where you live and how you live, but here is a snippet of some of the obvious and not so obvious costs so you can wrap your head around what the next 18 years (times two or three) will run you.

Parenthood by the numbers

$15,000
$3,784

The three-bedroom deluxe birthing suite at Cedars Sinai Medical Center

$2,100

A night nurse for one week in New York (not including meals)

$660

One year’s worth of Honest diapers

$120

One 12-week package at a Led Zeppelin-inspired baby music class

$22,850

One year of preschool at Williamsburg Montessori (bonnets included)

$5,200

Six days at Walt Disney World for a family of four (not including airfare)

$13,700

That bougie sleep-away camp in Maine

$300

One hour of couples therapy

$195

One private tennis lesson at New York’s Midtown Tennis

$64,000

One year at the Northeast liberal arts college of child’s choosing

$15:

ONE TITO’S DIRTY MARTINI

Photos from top to bottom: Randy Stulberg, iStock, iStock, @maison_leon, @ilsa_whk, @clarysarah, iStock, @notsomumsy, @ashleysargentprice, iStock, @ashleysargentprice, iStock, @notsomumsy

Noah’s tips on saving for baby

Pay yourself first: It’s a mantra you may have heard, but it’s a good one to follow.  Have automatic deductions for your retirement savings plan and direct your company to put 5-10% of your net pay into a separate savings account so it never goes into your account used to pay bills.  

Capitalize on raises: If you get a raise at work, try your best to save 100% of the newfound money.  You lived last year without it.  See if you can continue.  You’ll thank yourself later.

Diversify your income: Decide if there is a way for you to create a second or third income stream in your house.  Can you sell something on Etsy or eBay?  Freelance on Fiverr or Upwork?  Start your own blog or influencer platform?  If you can bring in a few extra dollars each month and put that aside for something special for your family, it will feel very rewarding.

Birth Stories: Jenny Parry

By Jenny Parry

BIRTH STORIES; Every mama has one. We encourage you to share your own birth story photo at #HATCHBirthStories

This is a story of the birth of our son Ryder.

On July 12th, my husband and I made plans to go to a couple of parties with friends. Seeing as my due date was far off (July 23rd), I figured: A) it was entirely safe to go and B) it could potentially be my last night out for a while, so best to make the most of it! Plus, I was feeling a little stir crazy from spending most nights at home up until that point.

Around 5 pm I got out of the shower and made a quick sandwich for dinner. Just as I was finishing eating, I felt a curious trickle of liquid!  Considering, I was nearly two weeks out, plus my doctor had assured me that I was only 1cm dilated and likely not ready to go for another week, this couldn’t be labor! However, when it kept coming, I called my doctor to get her opinion. However, since it was after hours, I had to speak with a nurse. The nurse mentioned that the cervical exam I had earlier that day, may have stripped my membranes; therefore it would be good to come in for an exam. At first, I thought it would go away, but when it didn’t, and more liquid kept coming, I had Jason drive me to the hospital.

On the way to see the doctor, my contractions began, and just as I got out of the car, my water broke! OK, now, I was definitely in labor! I had planned on laboring for as long as I could at home before I went to the hospital, but with the discharge, I knew something wasn’t right. As soon as we walked in, the nurse took one look at me and rushed me into the delivery room! It turns out it the discharge was meconium, and I needed to be hooked up to an IV right away. My doctor arrived and explained the situation—if the baby swallows any of the meconium he would have to go straight to NICU.

Leading up to the birth, I was on the fence about an getting an epidural. However, as I went into labor and could initially handle the contractions when they became more frequent and intense, I began to lose my focus and decided to get one. Moreover, I have to say, it was wonderful! The next few hours I tried to watch some television while Jason napped next to me. Around 1:30 am my doctor came in to check on me, and I was at 10cm! Therefore, she instructed me immediately start pushing, but he wasn’t progressing.  After some time, my baby’s heart rate dropped and wasn’t recovering, to avoid risk, they rushed me into an emergency c-section as it turns out he was breech. I had never been so scared or felt so helpless in all my life. The physical pressure was intense, plus I knew my doctor and the team were under immense pressure to birth my baby immediately. Then out of nowhere, my son’s cry pierced the air, and I let out a deep sigh of relief. The entire surgery was only three minutes, but it felt like a lifetime, and since it all happened so fast my husband wasn’t able to be in the room with us. However, as soon as he was born, they brought Jason into the room and placed our son on my chest. I felt the most incredible sense of relief and began to sob—Ryder was healthy and beautiful!

Throughout my pregnancy, I tried to keep a very loose birth plan, but I did have some expectations of how it would go. I imagined I would be at home laboring, walking around, have a vaginal birth, with immediate skin to skin, and then have my placenta encapsulated. However, none of that happened, and nothing went “as planned,” but in the end, I am merely grateful that light of my life was born healthy!

Birth Stories: Eden Grinshpan

By Eden Grinshpan | Photo's Courtesy of Eden

BIRTH STORIES; Every mama has one. We encourage you to share your own birth story photo at #HATCHBirthStories

This is a story of the birth of our daughter Ayv Rose.

I started having contractions around 2 AM, although I didn’t think they were contractions and instead felt that I’d thrown my back out! However, when they suddenly worsened, and I realized they were in fact contractions Ido called our doula to come over. She arrived at the apartment around 5 AM where I labored for another hour until I couldn’t take it anymore.

We called an Uber and headed to the hospital. I was moaning and screaming in pain, and couldn’t breathe or see straight. My doula kept telling me to exhale in a low tone, but I kept yelling in a high pitch, so halfway through my contraction (and crying) I would go low and sounded like a donkey! I can only imagine what the Uber driver must have thought—it was hilarious!

Related: Two of our Favorite Doulas Talk ALL Things Birthing

Upon arrival, they wheeled me into triage to check me, at which point I was six centimeters dilated. I begged for an epidural, and it was a gift from God!!! We spent the day at the hospital waiting as my contractions slowed down, but when it was finally time push around 6 pm, I pushed so hard that I went cross-eyed, literally. It was intense. She was born shortly after 7 pm, and Ido and I both cried when we saw her.

Eden Grinshpan birth story

We didn’t have a birth plan or go to a birthing class, but we did hire a doula and assumed the rest would sort itself out. I have to say one of the more unexpected parts of the process was not how exhausted I was from the birth but rather how exhausted I was during the 4th trimester because I didn’t sleep! Therefore, I can’t express enough to newly pregnant moms: rest as much as possible, take help when it’s offered, be kind, patient, and flexible with yourself. Childbirth and becoming a new mom is the hardest and most rewarding thing you will ever do in your life. Nothing will go as planned, but breathe through it and try to go with the flow as much as possible.

Let's Talk Cravings A vegan, a carbivore and a "whatever gal" weigh in.

Cravings are real. Like super real. And, when in the throes of a craving, there’s very little that satisfies outside of whatever it is that you’re craving. Or is there? Dare we ask, can we make smart choices when it comes to pregnancy cravings, or do we throw in the white flag and surrender to anything goes? 

Let’s find out. We asked Amanda Chantal Bacon, Denise Vasi, Violette_ Fr, Angi Greene, and Gail Simmons to share on their experience eating while pregnant. What did we learn? As it goes with all of pregnancy, no two styles are alike! 

The Health Nut
Amanda Chantal Bacon

“During my first trimester I was so nauseous it was crippling, which was weird because I didn’t tell anybody that I was pregnant. I was so sick and unfriendly at work that it started to read as rude when I stopped making eye-contact with everyone. However, as far as what I was eating, I needed animal fats every day, ALLLLL day. I couldn’t get enough yogurt, plus I was eating about 3/4 of a stick of raw butter on the daily, with about five pieces of toast — basically, the bread was a vehicle to get the butter down!

What's up with food aversions and food cravings?

Second trimester was incredible. I felt great with tons of energy as though I was in a perma-eyes-wide-open meditation. Even when I meditated, I would lightly close my eyes and be way out there! That was super fun. Plus, my eating returned to normal, better than normal, in fact. I wanted salads, green juice, and protein-rich foods, plus I had an aversion to sweets — which is so unlike me. I became the person that I always wanted to be; all the goals were happening, the boobs, the meditation, no sweet tooth, and patience. I was the dream version of myself.

And now, the third trimester, well, you know, it’s starting to get a little weird! After that second trimester, I thought it would be smooth sailing into my orgasmic birth…but no, shit is getting weird. I can’t stop eating, and the sweet tooth is back. I knew as much when my husband and I drove out to Ojai to go to a particular health food store that makes vegan, gluten-free buttermilk chocolate donuts with rainbow sprinkles! We could have saved the 4-hour drive and gotten a regular donut in LA, but no. I tried to tell myself that we were going to Ojai for “the nature” and hot springs, but really, it was that donut. I think my husband knew we were there for the donut when I got three and told him we could skip the hike. Perhaps this is the part where the cravings come in. Cute.”

The Vegan
Denise Vasi

“When pregnant, I’m less concerned with rules and more focused on listening to what my body needs. Leading up to this pregnancy, I didn’t know if my body was going to crave meat, and I prepared myself for that possibility (although I’ve yet to want it).  Everything that I follow is an 80/20 rule. I don’t believe in this idea of “cheating,” because who are you cheating? Nor do I like the term “cheat day.” Instead, I prefer to say we indulge. Plus, I practice vitamin + food combining, which teaches combining supplements with a specific food or another pill so that your body can best absorb the nutrient. For example, when I take vitamin D, I always have it with a half avocado, because the healthy fat will help to absorb the vitamin better. The way that you put things together enhances their effect so that your body gets the most out of it.” 

The Anything-Goes Gal
Gail Simmons

“With Dahlia, I craved very specific things, namely cold fruit and ice pops. This time I’ve been relatively even-keeled although very snacky. I go from an insatiable hunger to utterly full in two seconds, but want everything from pasta to candy to chocolate. Being in the food world has proved beneficial when it comes to an understanding of what I’m eating. I’m not particularly restrictive about what I eat, as long as I know it’s from a clean, quality source that’s nitrate & sulfate free. I’ve mainly been avoiding raw protein—eggs, and meat—but that ’s about it. I can’t stress enough the importance of making smart food choices and being educated on what you’re eating. 

For example, most cheese in America (unless you’re buying a rare European cheese) is fine, as it’s typically pasteurized or aged over 60 days—there’s very little to worry about in general regarding cheese in the States.

It’s important to be cautious about raw fish, meat, and eggs—mostly because of cross-contamination, as you don’t know how many people have handled it. I’m less worried about runny eggs during this pregnancy, but I’ll only eat eggs from a trusted source. I also try to avoid seafood filters like clams, oysters, and muscles, as it’s their job in the ocean to filter the water. I don’t eat soy for the same reason, as the soy plant acts like a sponge and it’s roots naturally absorb pesticides plus other contaminants while growing.”

The Carbivore
Violette_Fr

“Before I became pregnant, I had this vision of working out all the time and eating super clean, but you know how it is, once the hormones kick in, you’re like an animal, and there’s NOTHING you can do.  For the first four months, I couldn’t even look at a vegetable, a piece of meat, or fish (which has temporarily affected my hair without proper nutrients!), nor could I work out. I literally could only eat carbs and cheese, plus I was sleeping all of the time–so cliche, the French girl with the baguette! I was terrified. I thought that was the new me! Slowly the intensity of the first trimester began to wear off, and I was able to eat better and work out again.”

The Food Combiner
Melissa Wood

“During my first pregnancy, I was only at the beginning of my plant-based vegan journey, and towards the end of the nine months, I craved meat. However, this time, perhaps because I’ve been vegan longer, I haven’t had any weird cravings. When I was very sick, my doctor suggested that I try eating animal protein as it would give me more substance and help with the vomiting. I was desperate at that point and willing to try anything (literally anything) to feel better! Therefore, I made eggs a few times but immediately got sick. I also took a bite of Noah’s turkey & cheese sandwich (out of desperation on a flight), but then got sick. At some point, I gave up the notion that animal protein would help and accepted the fact that some women have sensitive pregnancies and I’d have to sit tight and wait it out.

Overall, my eating habits are not too far off from how I typically eat in my “non-pregnant life,” except that I eat a bit more. I have pure celery juice first thing in the morning on an empty stomach — I’ve been doing this for about three weeks and have never felt better. I’ve had celery juice for years mixed with other vegetables, but there’s something to be said about having it alone. Honestly, I was wary of jumping on this band-wagon as it’s such a “health” trend and I tend to be cautious about food trends. However, the benefits are incredible! It’s opened up this whole new energy level in me. About 30 minutes after my celery juice, I have a huge bowl of pineapple, nectarines, and raspberries, followed by two slices of avocado toast with sea salt, nutritional yeast, and lemon.

For lunch, I typically have a large salad with kale, cucumber, tomatoes, more avocado with lemon, apple cider vinegar, and olive oil dressing. I’ll pair the mixture with a veggie burger with Veganese, lettuce, avocado, and Zekial bread (I’ve been much hungrier these days). I either have plant-based burgers like the Omni burger or a veggie burger by Dr.Preggers — I find the veggie burger gives me that added substance my body needs while pregnant. I generally don’t eat between lunch and dinner as I’m not a snacker, but if I were to have a snack, I’d have a coconut yogurt with cashews or a green juice. For dinner, I’ll make a sauté with mushrooms, kale, and brown rice with a touch of olive oil, nutritional yeast, and lemon. I love rice; I’m a big believer in carbs. Our bodies consist of carbs, and we need them for our energy levels to thrive. I can’t imagine life without them.”

Babymoon in Style at These Luxe Destinations It's your last hurrah.

By Pilar Guzman | Photo By @anidorusso

It’s a common refrain among parents: “I don’t know what happened, but before we knew it, five years have flown since we’ve taken a trip alone.” The logistics of leaving young kids at home, to say nothing of your baby’s out-of-nowhere 103-degree fever that spikes the night before your departure, can derail even the best laid plans for escape.

Think of the babymoon as the beginning of what will hopefully become your annual commitment to each other, to one trip a year without kids from here on out. And, although we’re all in the midst of a global pandemic and thus quarantined to our home, we will travel again, and in the meantime it can’t hurt to start mentally planning. By the way, our version of a babymoon can be two nights in a motel watching Law & Order reruns and eating Taco Bell, which is awesome in its own right, or you can aim a little higher, a little sexier, maybe something involving a few palm trees. The point is to do it. If  you set the precedent, going forward, you will marvel at how quickly and deeply you slip into an alternate, pre-kid reality of sleeping in, taking morning beach swims, reading, and napping. 

We say, especially given your compromised mobility, that the sole point of this warm-weather or otherwise no-stress vacation, unlike most others you’ve taken in your life, is the absence of cultural enrichment or any sense of duty. It will feel like a time warp that’s as fleeting as it is weightless. And it’s in this anti-gravity, anti-guilt, should-free zone that you recommit yourselves to your partnership, when you remember why you chose each other in the first place. The best kinds of trips suspend not only physical but existential reality, pressing us—when stripped of our all-defining responsibilities—to pose questions like, “Who do we want to be separately and as partners and parents?” or “What are we going to do to make sure we prioritize each other when we are a family of three, four, or five.” 

The following properties are ones that we feel are appropriate backdrops to the evolving screenplay of your life. 

Hotel Amuleto, Zihuatanejo, Mexico

While we aren’t necessarily making a case for Zihuatanejo as a destination, there are some hotels, even ones as tiny as the 6-room Amuleto, that are enough of a reason to get on to go there…and never leave. Each of the indoor-outdoor palapa-style private suites has a plunge pool, hammock and seating area over the Pacific. But even if you venture into the public area, you feel like the only guests in the private home of adventurous creatives who’ve spent a lifetime traveling the world. Which is more or less true. The tiny aerie gives you instant permission to do nothing but read and drink (virgin) margaritas and eat copious amounts of guac served poolside by a staff who feel like family. You will dream about the breakfast bread basket and tortillas made fresh daily, as well as huevos ranchero forever after. Pro tip: Book a massage in advance. While they dont’ have a spa, they do have an exclusive hold on a massage therapist who has magical healing hands and who will set up her table in your room as you gaze through one heavy-lidded eye at the most dazzling sunset of all time. *If you have concerns about travel and the Zika virus, talk to your healthcare provider.

Playa Grande Beach Club, Dominican Republic

Palm Beach-WASP by way of the Dominican-Victorian, Playa Grande Beach Club is the “girlfriends getaway” capital of the DR among the Isabel Marant set. The nine-bungalow independent resort on an ocean-front  2,000-acre parcel is the chic-and-cheerful design dream of New York-based interior designer and owner Celerie Kemble. The antithesis of every other multi-pool all-inclusive, there’s a feeling of intimacy, but still with plenty of land around each of the whimsically decorated pastel gingerbread-style private bungalow. Kemble mixes Victorian wicker and ikat fabrics with pink and green tiled floors, footed copper tubs, and local furniture with the kind of cheerful, devil-be-damned, errant heiress insouciance we all aspire to. And while service is passable, food gets high marks for being exactly what you want it to be: healthy, avocado-forward, fresh juices, grain bowl type fare using local ingredients versus all of those other resorts that fly in the t-bone steaks for the gringos who need their staples. Your biggest outing should be drinks and dinner at the Aman next door, because there is little reason to leave otherwise. 

Montage Los Cabos, Cabo San Lucas

We love that Montage Cabo overlooks Santa Maria Bay, which is one of the only spots in Cabo where you can just walk right into the ocean and swim. The ocean is so rough with crazy undertows and a pounding break in front of so many of the Cabo resorts, so it’s sort of like the beach version of blue balls to be sitting looking out at the ocean and not be able to go swimming. So, the location is great, and it’s between Cabo, which is so crowded, and San Jose, which is much chiller, you can easily dip into either town, but are removed enough that you don’t feel you’re part of a hotel strip. The landscaping is great—all natives/drought tolerant (no weirdly green lawns or petunias)—the decor is sort of Mexican 2.0. Clean lines and of place, but no accent sombreros or serapes. And we love that every room, entry level and top tier, nail the indoor/outdoor thing (which is all you really want in a place like Mexico). All room share ocean views, large terraces with daybeds and outdoor showers. What else? Lovely, mellow pool scene, but sexy enough/good people watching that there’s some vibe. Food is solid, spa is fantastic. Oh, and not to be missed is the mezcal massage from the resident shaman, naturally.

Kamalame Cay, Nassau

It’s a catch-22: The flights to Nassau are cheap, frequent and easy. The bad news is, you are in Nassau with throngs of sunburned jort-wearing (that’s jean-shorts) gringos. The hack? The all-inclusive Kamalame Cay, which is a mere  15-minute hopper from Nassau and a world away from neon rubber bracelets that determine whether you can or can’t eat getting into a certain waterpark, and that will make you rethink your all-inclusive bias. Located on a 96-acre private island, chic, all natural Kamalame Cay will make you wish you could do your honeymoon over. We recommend staying in the beachfront bungalows, each of which have decks overlooking the ocean, beach access, and a golf cart and bikes for tooling around the island.  The best part? A breakfast basket delivered as though by fairies filled with pastries, fruit, yogurt, orange juice, and a thermos of coffee. No more awkward early morning fumbling in your robe while your spouse hides under the covers as you try to remember whether you carried the one or whether tip was included to begin with. 

Malibu Beach Inn, Malibu

Ever since the iconic Alice’s Restaurant on the Malibu Pier reopened under new management as Malibu Farm Restaurant in 2015 and disrupted–and elevated Carbon Beach’s status quo, with Helene Henderson’s haute surfer menu, it seems that all boats have risen along the cove between the pier and Carbon Canyon. The exclusive coastal outpost of Soho House opened, and then something unthinkable occurred: Malibu Beach Inn, formerly a motel-style property on PCH, was transformed by veteran hotelier Gregory Day, formerly of Shutters on the Beach, into pretty much the only luxury property on the ocean. The 47 rooms with private terraces as well as the main dining and lounging area cantilever over this prized strip of ocean. Outfitted with grey linens, sheepskins, cashmere throws,  and teak mid-century chairs, the cando-by-way-of-Cali design is like the love child between Aarne Jacobsen and James Pearse. Best of all, with its Cali-meets-Provencal menu (avo toast, burger, and the best soupe de Poisson outside of Marseilles) means you’ll never have any reason to leave the property. 

Ocean House, Watch Hill, Rhode Island

Let’s say you don’t want to get on a plane at all and don’t necessarily want to face yourself in a swimsuit. Once known as the “Queen of Atlantic Resorts,” the lovingly restored Ocean House—originally built in 1868 for well-heeled summer visitors from Cincinnati, New York, and Connecticut and the last remaining of seven such properties in Watch Hill—ticks all WASP-y fantasies of what a Rhode Island seaside resort might have been in a certain bygone era. (The town itself, a quiet oceanside hamlet on Rhode Island’s southern tip known for its discreet wealth, has always been a charming counterpoint to the famously flashy Newport.) Both historic and bright, Ocean House strikes that perfect balance between old world charm and just the right notes of new world luxury, think, high-end Scalamandré fabrics with a more modest New England vernacular of wood paneling, a 12,000-square foot spa, which includes an indoor pool. There is a high-end seasonal restaurant, which is lovely. Chances are you’ll want the mac-and-cheese from the club menu..

Ojai Valley Resort & Spa, Ojai, California

By the time you’ve hit the third trimester, there is nothing quite like floating in a big swimming pool on a cloudless Californian day when all you want to do is feel weightless—nor more of a relief than the scent of rosemary and lavender when your bionic sense of smell seems to be picking up every unsavory odor. At the Ojai Inn and Spa, the good smelling plants and herbs that seem to blanket all 200 acres of this property are mere table stakes. The Mecca  for all sorts of bleeding edge wellness treatment and practices, the spa takes cues from the Chumash Native American Tribe, who first settles Ojai Valley with cleaning desert clays and essential oils. You might also want to book an immunity-boosting Ayurvedic Detox Body Treatment as well as the highly soothing cardamon and sandalwood body mask. Healthy, yummy grain bowls and juices are a given and Ojai Pizza Co. is only a short drive away should you need a cheesey, gluteny fix. You’ll save the Pilates and hikes for next time. 

Tips for a safe babymoon:

Check in with OB-GYN

Ask for any records on your pregnancy you could need while far away.

Think about timing

2nd trimester is the perfect time to enjoy. You’re out of the 1st trimester ick but not big enough, or close enough to full term to stress it.

Avoid the 3rd Trimester

See above. It won’t be enjoyable if you can barely squeeze into an airline seat.

Identify Major Hospitals At Your Destination

Just in case.

Pace Yourself

Just remember that you may not be able to hike or swim as far as you once could, so just remember to relax and do what feels good.

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